


Mid-Winter Calendar

by Belsmomaus



Series: Traditions [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Advent Calendar, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Hux is not good with emotions, Injured Kylo, Kylo is a hopeless romantic, M/M, Misunderstandings, Sexy Times, chocolate kissing, happy reunion, lots of fluff, sick hux, slightly angsty, tragedy (background), unfair use of the Force
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-12-25
Packaged: 2018-09-03 08:26:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 21,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8705002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Belsmomaus/pseuds/Belsmomaus
Summary: “What the…” Hux’ bewildered voice faded to silence before a moment later he found it again. “Kylo? What is that thing currently blemishing my wall?”___Kylo surprises Hux with an old tradition from his own childhood: a calendar with 24 little presents. (Yes, it's an advent calendar-story!)





	1. The Day Before

**Author's Note:**

> This story is so full of fluff that the characters are most likely (no, more like definitely) out of character. Or - in favor of the joy and happiness of the season - just view it as 'a different take on the characters'. 
> 
> Rated M, just to be sure...
> 
> Additional tags will be added with additional chapters.
> 
> Enjoy the season! :D

“What the…” Hux’ bewildered voice faded to silence before a moment later he found it again. “Kylo? What is that thing currently blemishing my wall?”

The black silhouette of his lover appeared in the door to his bedroom a moment later, an eyebrow raised innocently. “Huh?”

He pointed towards the wall. A long cord was spanned from one corner to the other, the cord dipping lower in the middle. Lots of small pouches hung from it, all of them in horribly garish colors. And each of them with a number written on it, from one to twenty-four, as far as he could see. Of course they weren’t attached in order, neither ascending nor descending.

It was probably the ugliest thing he’d ever seen. The colors a nightmare, the arrangement of numbers a complete chaos and the whole thing in general had no sense whatsoever. At least none that he could deduce.

“Oh thaaat,” Kylo drawled and stepped closer with a big grin across his face. “So you found your Mid-Winter calendar. Do you like it?”

Hux blinked. He didn’t follow. “My what?”

“A Mid-Winter calendar. It’s an old Alderaanian tradition.”

“Alderaanian…” Hux still wasn’t sure if he understood. But if whatever this was came from Alderaan then it possibly came from Kylo’s mother. And Kylo’s parents always were a delicate topic, so he was instinctively careful with his words.

Kylo nodded. “It’s connected to the Mid-Winter festival. You know what-“ Hux shook his head. He had no idea what a Mid-Winter festival was, he grew up on a planet where it always rained after all, no matter the season. And Alderaan had been destroyed the same year he’d been born, so…

“The Mid-Winter festival was there to celebrate family and loved ones. To come together, be together. Children usually got presents. It’s still from the very old days where work dwindled down during the winter and the people had time to get rest and cherish each other before spring started the cycle of planting anew. “

“I still don’t see what that’s got to do with this,” he pointed at the monstrosity on his wall. “Or with me,” he added, almost as an afterthought.

Kylo chuckled, unfazed by his brittle tone. “Everything, of course.” He stepped around Hux and right behind him, so that Hux could feel his broad chest against his back. A moment later a set of strong arms wrapped around his middle.

“To make the wait for the festival not quite so long children usually got a Mid-Winter calendar. Small presents for the twenty-four days before the festival, one for every day. Just little knickknacks. My mother had made these for me when I was young. I loved them. And I wanted to make one for you.”

Kylo’s breath tickled where it moved his hair at the back of his head. There was this strange warm feeling expanding in his chest, that feeling that he’d learned to associate with Kylo. Kylo had made him a present; wanted to share some childhood memory with him.

It was almost too much.

“You said it’s for children. I’m not a child, Kylo.”

There came a chuckle from behind him, right before a big and slightly cold nose nestled in between his hair. “No, you’re not. Mid-Winter is to celebrate those you love. And I love you, Hux. And I wanted to show you and celebrate it with you.”

A gentle kiss was pressed right behind his ear.

Hux swallowed against the lump in his throat. His eyes skimmed across the arrangement on his wall again, the chaos within its array suddenly fulfilled a purpose, the garish colors suddenly bright spots of adventure amidst the grey of his quarters.

Something in his stomach clenched. An emotion so strong he couldn’t define it.

No one had ever done something like this for him before.

He turned within the embrace, his hands went up to get a hold of Kylo’s cheeks. He pulled him forward into a fierce kiss, full of emotions he couldn’t name. Their eyes met afterwards and he couldn’t help but grin, although it felt a bit shaky.

“You’re crazy!”

Kylo beamed at him. “Don’t I know-”

“So, when do I get to open the first pouch?”

“Tomorrow.”


	2. Day 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux finally gets to open the first part of his calendar.

Hux stood in front of the calendar and stared at the colorful pouches. He’d already spotted the one with the number one on it. It was a bright orange and seemed rather light compared to some of the other ones. He gnawed at his lip, then tore his gaze away and left the bedroom in favor of his living space, or more precisely, his desk to look through some more reports.

He’d wait for Kylo. Of course he’d wait for Kylo.

The brunet had wanted him to open his calendar pouches in the mornings, but Hux had opted to do so in the evenings. He wanted to appreciate what was inside and in the evening he had more time at his hands to actually do so.

He still had some difficulties believing that Kylo had gone to so much trouble just for him. Again the warm feeling spread through his chest at the mere thought of it. But also a tiny bit of unease, of doubt. Should he make a gift in return?

Just then the door opened and Kylo stepped inside. He took off his helmet and offered an expectant look. “So? What do you think?”

“I didn’t open it yet. I wanted to wait for you.”

Kylo shook his head, rolling his eyes but smiling. “Well, it’s about time, then.” He pulled Hux from his chair and together they went into the bedroom where Kylo shed his outer robes and threw them carelessly onto the bed before he flopped down himself.

Hux carefully removed the orange pouch and held it in his hands for a moment then he sat down next to Kylo. This felt strange. Exciting. Was this how Kylo had felt as a child when his mother had made this treat for him? Curiosity sparking? Anticipation bubbling?

Was this how it felt to get a present from a loved one?

He certainly liked this feeling!

“Come on, open it!”

And Hux did. A rather small metal box fell into his open hand as he shook the little pouch. After a small frown he opened that as well, just as careful. The moment the lid gave way a fruity smell reached his nose. Four tea bags were stacked inside. Clearly handmade. He leaned closer and sniffed again. There was a sweetness to the fruity aroma that made him close his eyes, imagining an orchard in full bloom of all things.

When he opened his eyes again Kylo was watching him, clearly fascinated.

“I’ve never seen that smile before.”

“What do you mean?”

“That smile you just made when you smelled the teabags.”

Hux shrugged, not knowing what to say to that. So he ignored it and changed the topic. “What kind of fruit is that? I’ve never smelled it before, I think.”

Kylo sat up again and inhaled the scent as well. “It’s Hindian pear mixed with sweetmelon. It’s a rather unusual combination. I tasted it once on Sapella and I knew you’d like it.” The brunet leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

Just a short, sweet peck and Hux felt himself smiling. So much thought had went into such a small thing. How long had it taken Kylo to find someone who made this ‘unusual combination’? That warmth inside twisted a little, made him uncomfortable with so much attention.

He stood up abruptly to get some distance between himself and this mess of feelings. Instead he headed across the room to heat up some water. And to focus only on the pleasant glow inside, his joy over his present. When he felt in control of himself again he looked back over his shoulder with a grin.

“Care for some tea?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I stick with the 'weak-willed boy, thin as a slip of paper and just as useless' backstory for Hux (words spoken by his father about him in the books).  
> And given those words and behavior from his father I rather doubt that Hux has ever received a present in his life.


	3. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux learns a tiny bit more about Alderaan. And gets a new treat, of course.

“Why twenty-four?” Hux asked as he rummaged through the gaudily colored little bags, with care of course.

“What?” A head with deliciously damp hair poked out of the fresher.

He finally spotted number two – swirls of black and midnight blue and deep purple adorned the fabric of the little bag, silver and white spots highlighted different parts; almost like a spiral galaxy. He took it off and turned as he stepped back. “I said, why twenty-four. Days I mean. It seems rather random.”

“It’s not,” Kylo replied then vanished inside the fresher again.

Hux rolled his eyes at that cryptic message and walked back into the living area to sit on his couch where his datapad waited for him. There were still some requests of different departments waiting for his approval. He was just about half-way through when Kylo stepped into the room in a set of fresh and comfortable clothes, his hair still as damp as before from his shower.

“It’s the number of family and harmony in Alderaanian mythology. I guess they thought it fits.”

For a moment Hux struggled to make sense of those words until he remembered his question from earlier, before requests for expensive replacement equipment from engineering had started to occupy his mind. “Ah… makes sense. Give me ten more minutes then I’m done here.”

Kylo shrugged and sank gracefully down to the floor, sitting crosslegged almost in the middle of the room. He straightened and closed his eyes. It was the first part of his meditation ritual. Although he only truly meditated for about once a week - falling into a trance like state for hours - he used this quick method to calm his mind every evening.

Well, ten minutes turned into twenty, but as soon as he put the datapad aside Kylo’s eyes opened expectantly.

Hux weighed the little galaxy-pouch in his hand. It was heavier than the one yesterday. Again that mix of curiosity, warmth and anticipation prickled in his chest and his belly and he found himself smiling even before he opened the bag.

Reaching inside with thumb and forefinger he grabbed something blocky, its surface almost like paper. Slowly he pulled it out.

It was a chocolate bar.

_Chocolate_!

It was very hard to get and quite expensive in the regions of space that the First Order occupied. It was even harder to get for those living on a spaceship or within the austerity of the military. He'd only ever tasted it as a part of dessert the few times he’d been invited – and actually attended – to formal dinner parties from high ranking First Order sympathizers.

He’d never been much for sweets until he’d first tasted a moist, rich chocolate tart. That’s when he’d realized that he actually _had_ a sweet tooth, but that it never had the chance to develop with the lack of proper sweets in his childhood or during his military career.

Before he knew what he was doing, he’d unwrapped it and stared at the dark, softly shining delicacy. It was segmented into four parts. He broke one off immediately, licking his lips then popped it into his mouth.

A moment later it started to melt on his tongue, the rich flavor filling his mouth. Heavy and sweet and… “Vanilla?”

“Yeah. It’s supposed to complement the earthy notes of this kind of cocoa bean. At least that’s what the description says.”

Hux closed his eyes to concentrate just on the taste in his mouth. Carefully he parted the block of chocolate with his teeth into two parts, pressing them against the roof of his mouth to lick across it. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d tasted anything so sweet. So special.

Suddenly a pair of lips pressed against his. Soft and playful, nudging him, seeking entrance. He opened up easily, welcoming the mischievous tongue that met his.

While his left hand took the chocolate bar and carefully placed it on the side atop his datapad – saving his treat – his right one reached up and buried itself into damp hair.

When they finally broke apart, Kylo didn’t pull away. He just stayed there, an inch away, licking his lips while staring intently into Hux’ eyes. “Absolutely delicious.”


	4. Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux gets ideas...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's the shortest. The next chapters will be longer than this one. Promise!

“What’s that?”

Hux eyed the ball of black fabric on his palm, light and impossibly smooth against his skin. Dramassian silk maybe? He picked up a corner between his thumb and index finger and raised his hand. There was a soft sound, almost like a whisper, as the material rubbed against itself as it unfurled. It was around three feet long and three inches wide.

“Is that-” He frowned and lifted his eyes up at Kylo who stood in the doorway, trying very hard to look innocent, but failing miserably. The corners of Hux’ lips curled into a playful smirk. “So… a blindfold, huh?”

Finally the brunet broke into a wide grin and waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

That was answer enough.

“And,” Hux asked, stepping slowly closer, his hands playing with the soft material that slid across his skin like cool water, “who is this for?” He waved the black fabric in front of Kylo’s face as emphasis.

Kylo bit his bottom lip and let his teeth rake across it as is pulled back out. Just watching that sent a tingling sensation down to Hux’ groin. “Whatever you prefer.”

Hux swallowed.

He imagined his lover in their bed, naked skin a beautiful contrast to the standard grey of their sheets and that blindfold across his eyes, looking like a strand of misplaced hair. He’d caress his shoulder, then kiss the spot next to his belly button, then lick his fingers. Tease his nipples. Stroke the inside of his thighs. No order to his ministrations. Kylo would never know where his touch would come next. He imagined the low moans, the writhing, the frustrated ‘ _dammit Hux, stop teasing and get on with it_ ’.

He’d love that. And he’d certainly try that. But not today.

A shiver ran down his spine the moment he decided. A shiver of anticipation and maybe, just maybe, a tiny bit of insecurity. He’d never bared himself like that. Put himself willingly at a disadvantage. But he trusted Kylo and the mere thought of being at his mercy, at least to a certain degree, made him shiver again. His pants felt a lot tighter than a moment before.

His voice sounded rough as he held out the black fabric in Kylo’s direction. “Use it on me!”

Their fingers touched as Kylo took it from him. Their gazes locked. There was a fire burning in those deep brown eyes. Hot and full of promises. “I’d hoped you’d say that.”


	5. Day 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And something sweet...

Hux eyed the small glass jar in his hands with interest, the label written in a script he’d never seen before. He was half-sitting on his desk and held the glass up into the light, trying to find out what it was without asking. The liquid within was viscous and of a dark, red-brown color. At least he’d thought so until he’d held it up against the light: it was more like dark, liquid amber.

“Is that-- honey?”

“Yep,” Kylo popped the ‘p’ at the end of the word, sounding pleased with himself. “And not that synthetic stuff. It’s the real thing.”

“The real…” Hux looked up, confused. “I thought those insects producing it were extinct.”

“Not everywhere. Some people managed to successfully introduce bees to the ecosystem of at least two Outer Rim planets before pollution killed them off in the Core.”

A bit perplexed Hux acknowledged his ignorance, never having cared for that sort of knowledge. “I didn’t know.”

Kylo strode over to him to place himself right in front of him, right up in his personal space. He took the jar from his hand and opened it, releasing a surprisingly spicy aroma. “Have you ever tasted real honey?”

Hux shook his head. He watched – first with disbelief, then open disapproval – as Kylo dipped his finger into the glass, coating it up with the almost golden liquid before holding it right in front of Hux’ face.

To his own surprise – _unsanitary, unseemly_ – he closed his lips around the offered fingertip and licked it clean. The act itself was unexpectedly sensual, his eyes never losing contact with Kylo’s, at least until the taste of the honey fully hit his senses. Lost to the sweet taste, so rich and spicy and earthy and something else – _was that resin?_ – his gaze lost its focus, staring blankly into space. This was _nothing_ like the overly sweet but otherwise tasteless synthetic stuff.

It was also nothing like he’d expected. He blinked, concentrating on the here and now again. “I thought it would be more-- floral? Isn’t it supposed to be made out of pollen or something?”

“This one’s forest honey. It’s a bit different.”

“How so?” Hux was surprised to realize that he _really_  wanted to know.

Kylo dipped his finger back into the glass and popped it into his own mouth, sucking the sweet treat off. He licked his lips with relish, inadvertently almost hypnotizing Hux with the movements of his tongue. “For this kind of honey the bees mainly collect the excretions of different insects in the woods, mostly plant lice, digest them themselves and then use it to create the honey.”

That sobered Hux up again. He must have misheard that. “So, I’m eating re-digested lice-shit?”

The brunet chuckled and grinned. “So to speak…”

Hux blinked, took that in, and, not for the first time today, surprised himself – and by the looks of it Kylo as well – by not caring. Instead he grabbed the other’s hand and dipped Kylo’s finger into the gold-brown liquid, to lick it clean again with a smile.

“How come you know so much about honey?”

The brunet shrugged. “I’ve come around. I read a lot. I talked with the beekeeper I bought this from. Take your pick. Did you know that honey has medicinal properties as well? It boosts your immune system, is good when you’ve got a cough and it can help you sleep. It even fights infections and enhances wound healing.”

Hux listened, all his attention focused on Kylo and the deep rumble of his voice and his open fascination. He hummed as a sign that he was listening while still licking around that fingertip, savoring everything to the last bit of sweet, sticky residue.

Kylo watched him for a moment, a smug grin lighting his face. “You know… there are far more interesting places you could lick it off of.”

Was he suggesting…

Hux eyebrows shot up and he let go of Kylo’s finger. “That sticky stuff? In my bed? Over my dead body!”

The infuriating smirk never wavered. “The shower then?”

He groaned in mock exasperation. He shook his head and rolled his eyes, but he smiled as he grabbed Kylo’s hand and pulled him towards the ‘fresher.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't supposed to end in a mini-lecture about honey. Oops ;)  
> Daughter of a beekeeper here and this turned out differently than I expected because of that. But I really liked this new direction the story took :)


	6. Day 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not the same without Kylo...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today I'll post way earlier than usual, I know.  
> But I won't get home after work, so instead of posting no chapter at all you'll get this one now.   
> Tomorrow it'll be around the usual time again. Maybe a tiny bit later. Just so you know.
> 
> Have fun :)

Hux’ fingers rubbed absentmindedly across the velvety fabric of today’s little bag. The yellow spots on the moss-green background felt slightly fluffier than the rest. His eyes were still glued to the message on the screen in front of him.

_Ran into some minor problems. Have to repair the shuttle before I can get back. Don’t wait for me. Enjoy your calendar – K_

Kylo was off to some Outer Rim planet to follow a lead on some Force artifact. It shouldn’t have taken long. He wasn’t worrying – he knew that Kylo was more than capable of looking out for himself – but he missed him. Not because they were currently separated – if that were the problem then they’d both need a different job – no, it was far more immature. He only ever opened the calendar with Kylo by his side and now he wasn’t and it just didn’t feel right.

He knew it was stupid. Especially since he only had the calendar for five days now. And still, he couldn’t help it.

But Kylo wanted him to open it.

He sighed and got up, turning the screen off. It was late – if he was honest with himself, he’d stayed up late, hoping the brunet would show up suddenly. For a moment he wished he could’ve accompanied Kylo. It was stupid. Kylo had his assignment and he’d had his own nerve-wracking mission today, visiting Tokkru – a stinky hellhole of a planet – and haggling over the price of components for Starkiller Base with a guy utterly unimpressed by a First Order general as well as a group of armed stormtroopers.

Hux went into the bedroom and placed the pouch with the polka-dots on his nightstand. His teeth already brushed he simply changed into his bedclothes and slipped beneath the blankets.

“Lights, fifteen percent.”

He leaned against the headboard, the dim lighting made the green of the pouch seem even darker, almost black. It was so incredibly light. As he stuck his fingers inside he knew why. There was nothing but a folded piece of paper. _Paper_!

Even more curious now he unfolded it to reveal dark ink and a surprisingly even handwriting.

Hux could only stare.

Kylo had _written_ him something. He’d found a piece of actual paper and sat down with a pen to write something.

His breath hitched. The personal effort – the mere intimacy of the whole act – stole his breath away. No one used paper anymore.

No one.

Except Kylo Ren.

Hux swallowed, his hands shaking a bit. The first words were a struggle. He’d only ever read handwritten stuff twice in his life, maybe three times, and it was harder than he would’ve thought. The letters weren’t uniform as their printed versions. There were swirls and connections that made him struggle, just as the tight fit of the words in general. But this was from Kylo and he’d be damned if he couldn’t make the effort to read it.

_You’ve shared so much with me by letting me inside your mind. I know it’s not the same but I want to share a little bit about me in return. Secrets that are usually buried deep within my own mind._

_I love fairy tales. I know they’re for children but I never stopped loving them. Their stories may be simplified or overly exaggerated, but they’re all tales of finding oneself in one way or another. And in the end, no matter the hardships the protagonist has to face, you can be sure that they’ll always find their place in the universe._

_It seems a part of me is utterly unable to part with that maybe childish hope._

It took him a long time to fall asleep after that.

 

Hours later the mattress dipped behind him. He opened his eyes blearily and looked back over his shoulder, his movements sluggish with sleep. “Kylo?”

A big hand gently touched his shoulder, rubbed it for a second, then soft lips pressed a kiss on the exposed skin next to the collar of his shirt. “Shh, go back to sleep, Hux.”

The hand left and the mattress moved again. Hux turned around and reached out one hand to place it on Kylo’s chest, his eyes already closed again. Drowsily he felt an arm closing around him, pulling him closer, while another one caressed his exposed arm. Another kiss was pressed against his skin, this time his forehead.

Hux smiled. Silence fell.

“Kylo?” he murmured into the other’s skin, before sleep finally claimed him again. “It’s not childish!”


	7. Day 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux has his problems with this one...

“You’re kidding!” Hux exclaimed more forcefully than planned as his hands dropped back into his lap, another piece of paper between his fingers only this one much smaller and with only a few words on it. A voucher.

Kylo looked at him, a bit surprised, his eyes drawn together in bewilderment. “No.” It sounded more like a question, albeit a defiant one. Then he plopped down on the other side of the coach. He winked his fingers in a ‘come on’ gesture and waited.

“ _Now_? No. Let… let me at least shower first.”

But Kylo only rolled his eyes and raised his left hand.

Before Hux knew what was happening his feet were lifted and his whole body was turned around with a little – and absolutely unfair – help from the Force. The movement only stopped when his feet were lying across Kylo’s lap.

Hux huffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaning sideways against the back rest to help keep him upright. “I hate you sometimes!”

Kylo had the audacity to laugh. “No, you don’t.” He placed one arm across his knees to keep his legs in place and grabbed the heel of one of his boots with his free hand.

Hux tensed. “Seriously, Kylo. I’ve been running around in these boots the whole day, just…”

Of course the brunet ignored him completely. He felt his left boot sliding off of his leg so damn smoothly that he was sure that the other used his little ‘magic friend’ to help him. The right one followed suit. When Kylo placed the boots on the floor next to him Hux saw his chance and pulled his legs back.

A quick hand closed around his knee and held him right where he was. He groaned in frustration – and more and more irritation.

Kylo frowned in earnest now. “What’s your problem? It’s just a foot rub.”

Hux just stared. “My prob… dammit Ren! It’s disgusting! I’m wearing these boots for twelve hours now. I’ve walked the length of this ship at least five times during the inspection today so…”

“Perfect,” his infuriating lover interrupted, “what better time for a foot rub, huh?”

“They _stink_!“ Hux hurtled back. He hated spelling it out, but if Kylo refused to use his common sense, he had to be blunt.

The brunet looked stunned for a moment, as if he were learning something new and trying to fit the information into an existing pattern. Just when Hux thought he’d finally gotten through to the other, Kylo leaned down towards his feet and sniffed.

Hux’s eyes popped open.

And Kylo shrugged. “They smell like feet, so?” He leaned back and his right hand started rubbing over the crumpled pants along his lower leg. “Relax, Hux. It’s been a long day and I love you. I won’t think you disgusting if your feet smell a little. And now lie back and grant your feet some rest, okay?”

He did as he was told and leaned back, still too surprised to argue. He understood the meaning behind those words, the message that he didn’t have to be perfect to be loved. Still, he wasn’t exactly comfortable with the thought of Kylo touching his stinky – and probably sweaty – feet.

He startled as warm fingers closed around his left foot, holding it in place as a thumb pressed deftly into the sole of his foot, trailing from the middle up along the edge of the ball of his foot.

A feeble moan slipped from his lips. He couldn’t help it.

Minutes later his worries were forgotten, only a contented smile graced his lips as Kylo’s hands worked the pain and stress from his day out of his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know about you but I'm with Hux here in this scenario.
> 
> But, apart from that, I can't wait till tomorrow (that's my favorite chapter) :)


	8. Day 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux doesn't feel well...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's my favorite :D

He hadn’t been hungry all day. His head was pounding and whenever he moved too fast the ship around him seemed to tilt sideways.

Hux couldn’t deny it any longer. He was sick.

He cursed that damn merchant and the whole stinky planet of Tokkru with him!

Yesterday he’d been called into medical. One of the troopers from their landing party had come down with a local virus. Nothing serious, roughly similar to the common cold. Sadly just as hopelessly to cure as the common cold. The physician had administered a shot to boost his immune system, just in case he’d caught it, too.

This was great!

He left the bridge earlier than usual to retire. The way back to his quarters had never felt so long. He dimmed the lights as soon as the doors closed behind him, groaning with relief as the brightness didn’t add to his headache anymore. He rubbed his face, feeling tired. And cold. He was shivering.

Forcing himself into action he took a hot shower. It made the throbbing in his head worse but at least he felt warm for the time being. Knowing when to accept defeat he crawled into his bed. Just to rest his aching head for a while.

He woke from a dull noise, followed by shuffling. It wasn’t loud, just sudden. He blinked in confusion, bleary-eyed, and rubbed his face with a clumsy hand.

“Hey, sorry. I didn’t want to wake you.”

“What time is it?” God, his voice sounded awful.

“Around ten.”

Hux startled. He was too late! No! This couldn’t be, he never…

“In the evening, Hux.” Kylo chuckled softly.

Hux didn’t see how that was funny. He relaxed anyway. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep at all. Sinking back into his pillow he closed his eyes in misery. His head was still killing him and his whole body felt heavy and sluggish. Weak.

Next thing he knew the mattress dipped beside him and warm fingers caressed his forehead, stroking some errant strands of his hair out of his face. “You still awake?” Kylo whispered.

He blinked again, dazed. Had he fallen asleep _again_?

Oh, Kylo had asked a question. He hummed in answer, not trusting his head with a nod.

“Good,” the brunet murmured. “Then sit up. I made you some tea. You need to stay hydrated.”

As he struggled to sit up against the headboard he wondered how Kylo even knew about his sickness. Maybe he’d projected his misery too loudly. Or maybe sleeping in the middle of the day had given him away. It wasn’t important, really. The bed was tilting sideways a bit and he’s grateful as a warm hand grabbed his shoulder; steadying, comforting.

Hux smiled weakly as he took the warm cup in both of his hands to sip at the tea. It was a herbal mixture he didn’t have the nerve to identify at the moment. And it was sweet. He frowned. “Honey?”

Kylo smiled and for the first time Hux noticed the worry beneath it. “Medicinal properties, remember?”

Hux chuckled. “Good we didn’t use it all up, huh?”

He drank the rest of the tea while Kylo vanished into the fresher to get ready for bed. Hux got up afterwards, slowly to make sure that the world didn’t start spinning, and went to relief himself. When he crawled back into bed, shivering, the brunet already waited for him and pulled him close. With that broad warm chest pressed against his back and long warm legs tangled into his, he sighed and the shivering stopped pretty soon.

Just as he’s about to close his eyes a pouch appeared wordlessly before his face like a tiny cloud of tiny blue and white flowers.

He took it. It weighed almost nothing.

Hux isn’t surprised to find yet another slip of paper inside. A smaller one this time, folded only once like the voucher from yesterday. He flipped it open and blinked with tired eyes at the lines in front of him. They blurred together and as he tried to force them into focus that pain behind his temples spiked again. He closed his eyes and brought the paper up to his shoulder.

“Read it to me.” It wasn’t a question and yet his soft tone made it one.

Warm fingers closed around his for a moment. When they left, the paper was gone as well.

“I love your freckles.”

It took him a moment to realize that those words were what’s on the piece of paper. Something important to Kylo that he wanted him to know.

“Really?” It slipped out, his disbelief clear, even in his tired mumbling. He’d never liked them. Children had freckles, not a general of the First Order.

“I find them quite endearing,” Kylo whispered right into his ear. And as if to emphasize this Kylo pulled the collar of his shirt aside and nuzzled his lips against the skin between his shoulder and his neck, right where most of those light-brown spots were located.

Hux couldn’t help but smile. He snuggled closer and fell asleep to gentle kisses, enveloped in blissful warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No matter how fluffy or funny, sooner or later the hurt/comfort just wiggles through, I can't help it.  
> I'm obviously incapable of writing something without at least a small h/c part.


	9. Day 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is fine. Kylo disagrees.

It had been sweet during the morning but now Hux was just annoyed. He stalked through the hallways of the Finalizer back to his quarters, Kylo close on his heels. Throughout the day the brunet had shown up on the bridge or in his office to keep an eye on him and make sure he was okay. But then he’d pulled him from his post right at the end of his official shift to drag him to the officer’s mess to get him to eat something for dinner and turn in early.

He’d felt much better this morning. The headache down to a small nuisance. No dizziness. And he’d been hungry. So there was absolutely no need for all this fussing about!

The moment the doors closed behind them Kylo obviously saw the need to resume their discussion right where they’d left at their table in a quiet corner of the mess hall.

“You were sick yesterday. Your body needs the rest to properly heal.”

“I’m fine!” Hux slammed his uniform cap onto his desk, using more force than intended.

“You don’t look fine!” Kylo insisted.

Hux balled his hands to fists then forced them open again. Instead he threw his arms up in frustration, growled and plopped heavily into the chair at his desk. He activated the screen, intent on getting some more work done, ignoring his infuriating lover on purpose. He grimaced, trying to blink the letters into proper focus.

“Hey, catch!”

The shout came out of nowhere. Startled he jerked up and turned only to spot something bright pink moving quickly through the air, right at him. Flinching back he instinctively threw his hands up, although he couldn’t tell if to catch it or to cover his face. In the end he managed neither. The object slipped in between his raised arms and smacked against his chest before it dropped onto his thigh and further down onto the floor, each impact accompanied by a rattling sound.

His chest was heaving, his heart beating heavy against his ribs from the adrenaline of the shock. “What the hell?”

“Your reflexes are slow,” Kylo stated matter-of-factly.

Hux slumped back in his chair, all of a sudden feeling drained. He had no energy left to fight. He rubbed his hands across his face and pointed vaguely at the screen afterwards. “Look, I need to go over this. The new specifications from engineering totally screw up the timetable for the completion of Starkiller. I need…”

Hands were suddenly on his shoulders, kneading softly. “You need to rest.”

Hux sighed and closed his eyes in defeat. He hated it when Kylo was right. He actually _was_ tired. And a bit chilly.

It wasn’t much later that he found himself in his nightclothes, sitting against the headboard, the blanket up to his hips and a comfortable sweater over his pajama top. He leaned against Kylo and pushed his bare feet against Kylo’s for more warmth. The brunet jumped, as always, cursing his “chunks of ice” under his breath, but enclosed them with his own nonetheless. He handed him the little pouch again. It really was an obnoxious shade of pink. Inside was a small metal box. More tea maybe? No, it had rattled earlier and it was too heavy. A bunch of gleaming bonbons greeted him upon opening it, all of them a dark orange color with a hint of brown.

“What are they?”

“Try one.”

That wasn’t helpful at all, but still, he took one. It wasn’t what he’d expected. Neither sweet nor tasting of orange. The bonbon was a bit sour, spreading a fresh feeling in his mouth. Definitely lemon. But it was also spicy, stinging his tongue with a slightly burning sensation after a while. Ginger. “Mmmh.”

“A little bit of ginger for my little ginger.”

He could hear the grin in Kylo’s voice, thinking himself oh so clever. He wanted to come up with something witty, but his muscles finally relaxed and he started to notice that he was more worn out than he’d realized. So his brain refused to cooperate with his wishes and he kept to the simple truth. “I like them.”

With a sigh of contentment he sank down to lie next to the brunet, his head on Kylo’s lap. He curled his hand around the other’s thigh and listened to his breathing. After only a moment warm fingers were running through his hair.

“Tell me a story,” he mumbled, unsure where this was coming from, but suddenly eager to hear Kylo’s voice.

“Huh? What story?”

“A fairytale.”

Silence fell and the fingers stopped. Hux wondered if maybe he’d overstepped his boundaries, that bringing up that shared secret so soon was a bad idea, that…

“Ok,” Kylo sounded flustered, but only for a moment. His fingers started moving again in his hair. “Do you know the one with the ginger mouse?”

Hux frowned. “A ginger m… you’re making this up, aren’t you?”

“You wanna hear it or not?”

He snuggled closer and closed his eyes, just enjoying the moment and the warmth and the memory of a pleasant burning on his tongue. “Go on.”


	10. Day 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux couldn't have predicted this one. Not in a million years.

It’s strange.

The same way being constantly checked on by Kylo had irritated him the day before he now kind of missed it. Or maybe that was just because his day was surprisingly boring, even with the additional work load left from his two lazy days. He suspected Mitaka to have worked off some of the things that had been piling up on his desk.

There’s really nothing keeping him on the bridge any longer. Their quarters are empty, much to his dismay, well, they weren’t _theirs_ officially, Kylo still had his own but Kylo was always here anyway, so they might as well be ‘theirs’.

He had eaten already and for once nothing important to do. So he changed into casual clothes, sat down on the couch, one leg folded underneath him, his datapad in his lap and a cup of that amazing tea from the first day next to him. The intoxicating, fruity smell helped him forget his surroundings while he read a book.

It was quite a while later – he was just scrolling down to another chapter – when the door swooshed open to reveal a red faced Kylo with his hair plastered against his head and brow.

Hux got up. He’d really missed him today.

“Hey,” he said as a way of greeting and leaned closer to press a kiss to the brunet’s lips. His nose wrinkled, before the grimace spread over his whole face. “Eh, you stink!”

“Happens when you work out.”

Hux rolled his eyes at that deadpan comment and pushed his lover towards the fresher.

With the soft sound of running water from the other room he stood in front of the calendar. It was thinning out already, a third of the colorful pouches gone. The grey patches of wall visible in the gaps seemed dull all of a sudden. He shook his head to shake this strange feeling and snatched today’s little bag instead. It looked almost like foliage, all kinds of lively greens overlapping and blending together.

He took it over to the couch, popped one of the ginger bonbons into his mouth on the way and sat down again, leaning his head back with his eyes closed and simply enjoyed the pleasant burn of the ginger on his tongue.

He felt the shadow over him a second before a warm mouth settled on his. His lips parted, his tongue licked across Kylo’s lips, over his gums and tongue, spreading the spicy remnants of ginger. An appreciative humming noise was the answer before Kylo let go and plopped down next to him.

“Better now?”

Hux took in the fresh smell of shampoo and bodywash, his eyes lingered a moment at his damp hair, falling cheekily into his eyes.

But before he could say anything Kylo spotted the green pouch in his lap and his whole face lit up. “Oh, that one!”

Fascinated Hux watched him a moment longer, but in the end the brunet’s excitement was catching and he lifted the bag – this time a bit heavier – to better work his fingers inside. Something poked at his skin. Frowning he pulled the slender item out. And stared. It was made of metal, painted with color. He still stared. And he couldn’t help the disappointment creeping up on him. “A figurine of your lightsaber?” He bit back the sarcastic “seriously”, but he’d probably implied it anyway.

He really wasn’t fond of the weapon, in contrast to his lover.

“Yes,” Kylo replied, that bright enthusiasm still coloring his voice, although a little bit of uncertainty had crept in, “but… it’s just a symbol.”

Hux felt guilty for dampening Kylo’s joy. And not just that. Days of presents, just for him, without anything in return; he was so damn ungrateful! With a lump in his throat he tried to make up for it. “A symbol for what?”

“I want to train you with it. The real thing of course.“

Hux mouth gaped open. He was utterly perplexed. “You- you want to train me? Fighting with _your_ weapon?” he repeated dumbly.

He couldn’t grasp it. He saw the lightsaber in his mind’s eye, the angry color, the instable hissing, the dangerous crossguard. Its elegance but also its crudeness. A blaster was more to his liking, or even better: a rifle.

Kylo nodded next to him. Quite eagerly. “Yes.”

“Why?” Yeah, _why_?

“Because I want you to be able to properly defend yourself in case you’re unarmed and I’m injured or otherwise incapacitated.”

Hux just stared, unsure what to feel or think. “Prepared for every eventuality, huh?” he finally asked. It seemed like a pretty unlikely scenario and yet Kylo had considered it. That bubbling warmth dribbled back into his chest and it only intensified as Kylo’s next fond words.

“I learned from the best.”

A hand was suddenly on his face, holding it in place as the brunet leaned in to kiss him again.

Kylo stayed there, only inches away, their breaths still mingling as a boyish grin split his lips. “There’s also something obscenely hot about the image of you in a fighting stance with that lightsaber in your hand.”

Hux chuckled. “Is that so, huh?”

He moved quickly, agile, sliding into Kylo’s lap, straddling him. Hux looked down at him, a cheeky grin on his face. “You could have that right here. Right now.”

Kylo closed his arms around him and pulled him closer, their groins rubbing against each other in the process. Soft moans escaped them both. “I need your answer first. Will you train with me?“

Spending more time with Kylo? Working out together? And in the mean time gaining additional skills with a melee weapon? There wasn’t much to think about, really.

“Yes, I do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the thought of Hux with Kylo's lightsaber in his hands, fighting, maybe even protecting Kylo with it... that's just my kind of drug!


	11. Day 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is a bit slow on the uptake... at first...

“What’s… _dice_? Is that an invitation to gambling?”

Kylo rolled his eyes while at the same time pressing his lips together to suppress a grin. “Look again, maybe more closely this time.”

And he did. There were two dice but they weren’t the same. Both had ten sides each. Words were written on them, but different ones on the both of them. And as he actually _read_ those words understanding dawned. “Oh… _oh_ …”

Kylo couldn’t keep it in this time, he barked with laughter.

Hux crossed his arms, irritated by his reaction. Or rather, he was ashamed by his open display of stupidity. Which might have come off as prudish as well.

The brunet sobered up a bit. He brushed the beginnings of tears of laughter away and nodded encouragingly in his direction. “Come on, go ahead! Roll them!“

He wasn’t sure, still angry at himself, and yet he couldn’t say no to Kylo when he was looking at him like that. “Alright…,” he sighed and grabbed the dice. They were surprisingly heavy. A silvery white metal with black letters. He rolled them on the surface of his desk.

Before he had the chance to properly read them his left hand was grasped and pulled up. Distracted like that he looked up as well, watching Kylo as he pushed back the sleeve of his uniform a bit. Those dark brown eyes held his gaze as he brought his hand to his mouth and before he knew it Kylo’s tongue darted out and licked across his wrist.

Hux shivered. He wasn’t sure if it was the smooth yet slightly rough feeling of that hot, wet tongue that first licked once all across his wrist before twirling little spirals and circles across the delicate skin just with its tip or maybe that intense gaze, equally smug and provocative. His breaths came quicker and thinking straight got difficult all of a sudden. “Um, I rolled the dice,” and even without looking he knew exactly what they displayed, “so, aren’t I’m the one who’s supposed to follow the instructions?”

Kylo waggled one of his eyebrows. With one last swirl of his tongue he ended his ministrations and slowly let go of his hand again. Hux felt strangely bereft by the action, his wrist cold as it slowly dried.

“I’ve never been one for rules,” Kylo finally said with a grin.

Hux opened his eyes wide in mock surprise. “You don’t say!” But then he dropped the game and stepped closer to his lover. “It’s your turn.”

The dice started rolling without being touched. Did that count as cheating? They stopped. Hux looked.

Rub. Ass.

A grin spread across his lips. He could certainly do _that_. Holding the other’s gaze just like he had done before he leaned closer, reached his arms down and around the impressive body until his hands touched what they’d been looking for: two delicious globes, clad in tight-fitting pants. He groped and squeezed, took his time and watched Kylo’s reactions closely.

Hux leaned even closer, bringing their faces together, almost kissing as he whispered, “I like this game! My turn again.”

And he reached blindly for the dice.


	12. Day 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Be gentle with that one."

Hux shut the screen off. It was enough for the day, he’d decided. What was left now could also wait until tomorrow.

He got up, clasped his hands together behind his back and stretched the stiff muscles of his shoulders and neck. He rolled his head around slowly, first in one then the other direction, glad he’d changed out of his uniform earlier, otherwise the stiff collar would now rub uncomfortably against his neck.

It was time for his little surprise. The mere thought tugged at the corner of his lips, turning them up into a tiny grin. He could really get used to this. Not because of the presents – although he liked each and every one of them and the dice had turned out to be far more fun than he’d anticipated – but because of the quality time with Kylo. Each evening was special and different and new, not like before when they had fallen into this easy routine, but a routine nonetheless.

Trying to be quiet he trudged into the bedroom. Kylo still sat on the floor on the other side of the bed, cross legged, back straight and his eyes closed. His face was completely relaxed in meditation. Hux had no intention of interrupting him. He would wait a little bit longer. Still, he could look where the next pouch was. When he didn’t spot the number he stepped closer to pull two bags apart that were tangled. And indeed, one of them – blood red with fine black lines that looked like cracks in dried earth – held the number eleven.

“Be gentle with that one!”

Surprised to hear the deep voice already he turned to see Kylo’s eyes still closed. He shook his head a bit – no, he wouldn’t ask and he wouldn’t wonder either. Instead he took the pouch down gently. It was thick yet light and it felt soft. Whatever was inside was easily compressible. And it rustled.

No wonder, it was a big bunch of paper, carefully wrapped around something. Jewelry? Something made of glass? Whatever it was, it had to be fragile.

With great care he unwrapped his surprise and bit by bit unveiled two blossoms. Big and pinkish red, mostly closed. They looked strangely waxy and felt unexpectedly firm, not at all like the fragile leaf of a blossom. Something white was dusted across their surface. When he touched it and felt the crystalline structure beneath his fingertips he knew what it was: sugar.

Fascinated he looked up. “What is it?”

Kylo’s eyes were open this time. “Something special.”

Damn him and his cryptic answers.

The rustling alerted him. And looking down again he saw one petal move backwards until it broke off. It floated upwards, right up to his face where it hovered in front of his lips, gently nudging them.

“Open up.”

He did. The petal sank down onto his tongue where he started chewing.

“It’s a glacéed hibiscus blossom.”

It was sweet of course, but also floral and soft and like spring. Both taste and consistency were foreign to him but good. He was eating a blossom. He’d never done that before. Never even thought about stuff like that before Kylo and his adoringly crazy calendar idea.

Licking his lips he opened his eyes again, only now noticing that he’d closed them. Kylo wasn’t on the floor anymore but close by, watching him.

“Did- did you just Force-fed me?” Hux asked and Kylo laughed. That deep, rich laugh that was only reserved for him. And the brunet stepped closer to embrace him from behind. “I’m going to get fat at this rate with all these delicious sweets.”

Kylo snorted. “I highly doubt that.”

Big hands stroked across Hux‘ belly, caressing it. Sure, it was flat but instead of taut skin over well-defined muscle he had nothing to show but soft, flabby skin due to his lack of physical exercise. He really needed to find more time to work out.

Another petal floated in front of him. Kylo picked it up and took a bite before holding the rest in front of Hux’ lips for him to eat.

“Still,” Kylo mumbled against his neck, his chest vibrating softly with mirth, “your sharp bones could need a little cushioning.”

Hux inhaled sharply in mock-indignation and without much thought snapped at the piece of blossom, biting down on Kylo’s finger on purpose. A satisfied grin on his face at the cry of surprise from behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ate those once at a medieval market and they are absolutely delicious!!!


	13. Day 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A light amidst a bleak and dark day...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're already at half-time... oh no... time flies...

The moment the commlink had opened and the screams in the background sounded through the bridge the day had turned downhill and fast.

It had been an accident, a horrible show of human error. A heedlessness turned disaster.

A magnetic lock had lost cohesion, leading to a giant plate of durasteel toppling off the wall before it had been properly installed, ripping technicians with it and crushing humans and equipment alike.

As Hux had arrived there hangar three had been a chaotic mess. Injured and bleeding crewman everywhere, screams and whimpers filling the vast space. Amidst medics and technicians he’d found Kylo, probably alerted by an outcry in the Force or something. He’d been helping to move the wall plate as well as injured people.

It was late now. Really late. But he’d had to work through the aftermath of it all. Inspecting the damage, assessing the state of his personnel, organizing clean-up, ordering a group of less rattled technicians to find out what went wrong in the first place. A TIE fighter had been damaged, lots of equipment unsalvageable. Two men had been killed, five more injured, one of them critical. He would need replacements.

He hated losing his men. Of course, as a general, he knew it was part of his job. But it was also his job to protect his people. He could deal with losing soldiers in a fight, but this was just so damn stupid and completely unnecessary. A needless waste of resources!

His anger had blown over, leaving him numb as he stepped into their quarters. His shoulders sagged, pulled down by the weight of responsibility and exhaustion. He longed for the blissful oblivion of sleep.

Kylo was still awake, lying in bed, reading in the dimly lit room. Waiting for him.

Hux had no energy to acknowledge his presence. He simply headed for the refresher to brush his teeth. He mechanically changed into his nightclothes then stumbled back out. And right into Kylo. Without saying anything – and he’s so unbelievably thankful for that – Kylo pulled him against his chest and held him in his embrace. Warm and solid and _just there_. And breathing became easier after a while, the pressure on his shoulders lifting as if shared.

When Kylo let him go, Hux feared he’d ask, but instead he was faced with an unsure, questioning gaze and a little bag in a blue-green tartan pattern.

Half an hour ago he’d been confident about having no nerve for anything anymore, too tired, too worn out, especially for any kind of well-meant solace. And yet here he stood, staring at that colorful piece of cloth and something warm poured into his stomach, burned at his eyes. A smile nudged at his lips. It felt tentative and strange, his face stiff.

He took it and sat down on the bed. Again the pouch was a bit bulging but easily compressible. His fingers connected with something very, very soft. Curious he pulled it out and something green and ridiculously fluffy spilled onto his lap. With a skeptical frown he picked a corner and lifted it up. And the mystery became clear: socks.

Thick and warm. And so not regulation.

Already he imagined what they would feel like on his cold feet.

“Your feet are always so cold in bed…” Kylo explained as if reading his mind. As if an explanation had been necessary at all.

“You’ve got a problem with my ‘chunks of ice’?” he asked, a playful hint in his voice. He was surprised at himself, but somehow he felt as if it were possible all of a sudden to maybe put this day behind him. As if that warmth inside of him was pushing the numbness away.

Kylo sat down next to him, a mischievous grin on his lips. “Maybe?” He gently nudged Hux’ cold feet with his unfairly warm ones before he leaned over and rubbed his nose against his ear and kissed his neck. “I just want you to be comfortable.”

Without further words they snuggled up in bed, Hux’ head on Kylo’s chest and his socked feet – they were so incredibly soft and warm – entwined with Kylo’s. He fell asleep almost instantly.


	14. Day 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to redeem a voucher...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's a bit later today than usual. I just came home after an evening out with colleagues at the Christmas market.  
> But now I'm here and you'll get another sweet chapter :)
> 
> Also: thank you all for your wonderful and lovely comments! They really make my day and I'm happy that you like this fic just as much as I do! :D
> 
> Now, enjoy!

His whole body hurt, but in a good way. Well, mostly.

Back in his quarters he rolled his shoulders, wincing at the pain of protesting muscles. He’d be sore for days if he hurt this much already. The mere thought made him groan. That or the burning ache, dragging all the way from his shoulders over to his spine.

Still, he regretted nothing. In fact, leaving the bridge right at the end of his shift to look for Kylo and see if he’s got time for that promised lightsaber training had been – although a longshot – a great idea.

They’d been at it for hours and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d worked out that hard. After a warm-up Kylo had shown him some basic moves, but right after that he’d pressed the hilt of his lightsaber into his hand, plunging him in at the deep end. Hux had never cared much for that weapon and yet, holding it in his own hands, it had felt so amazingly powerful and dangerous. Kylo had used another lightsaber that he’d also built himself. The previous model so to speak. Crude and simple and nothing special, but it was enough for their training.

It had been absolutely great. Not just because he loved watching Kylo in his element and not because he’d gained a new respect for said weapon, not even because he was faced with a physical challenge instead of an intellectual one for once, no, it was because they’d gotten to spend so much time together. Just the two of them, sharing something new, something special.

He moved his head around and stretched his neck, groaning again. Even though he’d set the sonic showers in the training room to maximum the vibrations hadn’t managed to soothe his muscles. Maybe he’d overexerted himself a bit. He wasn’t used to constantly swinging a weapon around after all; or absorbing shockwave after shockwave with his muscles when said weapon collided with another.

“You should open your calendar,” Kylo said, seemingly casual but there was something all too eager in his voice that made Hux frown.

“Okaaay,” he drawled, suspicious, but still went to retrieve today’s light blue pouch, criss-crossed with thin lines in every color imaginable. It was really heavy. Not surprising considering its contents: a bottle of massage oil.

“Now,” Kylo waggled a suggestive eyebrow, matching his playful grin, “take that shirt off and hop into bed!”

Hux still tried to work this out. It fit too well and yet it couldn’t be, right? He asked anyway. “Did you plan this?”

Kylo huffed out a laugh. “You came to me, remember? I had no idea, but it’s quite convenient. Now, come on, get naked already.”

Hux rolled his eyes and tutted, “So bossy…” He pulled his shirt off anyway.

Kylo gently pushed him towards the bed. “You need it! You totally overdid it today. So, someone needs to make sure you’re able to move at all tomorrow.”

Hux pulled the blankets away, wincing again at the protest from his shoulders at the small act and lay down. Kylo was on him in an instant, seating himself comfortably right beneath his ass; straddling him. There was a plop, some noises of slick skin against slick skin then those big, warm hands were on him, softly running across his back to distribute the oil everywhere. It smelled of nuts. Not what he’d expected.

A moment later he was too distracted to muse on the smell. He sighed in pleasure as Kylo rubbed his hands along his spine in small circles, slowly moving upward from the small of his back to his neck. The pressure was gentle, his fingers moving outwards across his ribs, his shoulder blades, then his shoulders and upper arms.

His eyes had closed a long time ago.

Slowly Kylo intensified the pressure, dug harder and forced tense muscles to loosen up.

Hux moaned in pleasure and sometimes in discomfort, when certain areas were more sensitive and the pressure there had him wincing. Kylo always adjusted quickly.

After massaging the length of his neck for a while those deft fingers trailed back down along his spine where they finally left him completely. Hux noticed but it took him a while to comprehend. He was drowsy and his whole body felt loose and pliant like warm wax.

He felt the shift when Kylo leaned over him and planted a kiss onto his cheek. He stayed there, his lips brushing against his hair, tickling, as he whispered, “You were amazing today!”


	15. Day 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo's away on a mission...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is where the slightly angsty part begins...

Kylo had been sent on a mission for Supreme Leader Snoke for at least two days.

So Hux used the time to get back to Starkiller Base and check up on the work progress. He’d spent the whole day inspecting the main compound and listening to reports on all the other departments and construction zones, the dull ache that lingered in his muscles at once a nuisance and a sweet reminder.

It had been a long day. Demanding, but in a good way. And even with their recent change in the timetables he was satisfied with the overall progress. He’d opted to stay on the planet. It would be an unnecessary waste of time and resources to fly back to the Finalizer only to come back tomorrow morning again.

Hux stepped into his quarters. They were bigger than on the Finalizer and yet they seemed too big and empty. Somehow cold although they had been heated up prior to his arrival. He tried to pin it on the Spartan interior without any personal touch, but deep down he knew it was due to the absence of Kylo.

His gaze dropped instinctively on the two small pouches on his nightstand, their bright colors sticking out like Phasma amongst her troops. He’d brought them with him, probably even would have if Kylo hadn’t insisted.

After unpacking his little bag he went back to work, going over his plans for tomorrow and Mitaka’s status reports on the Finalizer until his eyes started hurting. He put the datapad away and got ready for bed. Leaning back against the headboard, his feet snugly in green socks, he took the little pouch with the number fourteen. Just from gently squeezing it he knew that it contained a piece of paper, a big one.

Another secret, shared in written word.

Hux dimmed the light and pulled the blanket closer. He pulled the paper out, unfolded it and started reading. It was easier this time. He finally got a feeling for Kylo’s handwriting, the expressive strokes around narrow letters.

_I chose you. I’ve always chosen you._

_Do you remember? A year ago when the Supreme Leader decided it was time for me to take up a more active role in the First Order? The first meeting of First Order officials I attended?_

_There were all those generals, discussing tactics and current projects and new plans and ideas. The Supreme Leader wanted to station me on the Dark Cloud with General Derrix. He thought the general would be best suited to accommodate to my integration into command structure as well as my need for independent actions._

_I declined._

_Because I chose you!_

_You were the only one there who wasn’t intimidated by my mere presence. You weren’t afraid to talk back to me when you thought I was wrong. You were so young and thin amidst a bunch of battle-hardened warriors and indulgent deskjockeys. And yet you dwarfed them all._

_You intrigued me and I wanted you, not General Derrix._

_The Supreme Leader was skeptical since you’ve just started working on Starkiller Base. He wasn’t sure if you’d be up to the task of juggling a project of that magnitude while at the same time catering to me and my missions as well._

_I assured him that you were the right choice._

_I chose you._

Hux had trouble swallowing past the lump in his throat. Even back then Kylo had vouched for him, had even contradicted the Supreme Leader. And all of that without even knowing him.

And all the while Hux hadn’t been impressed with the black knight at all. Even less so as he’d learned that he’d been chosen to babysit the unpredictable Force-user. He’d seen it as yet another test of his worthiness of the station he’d been holding at such a young age.

Seeing the merit in Ren’s presence from a military perspective hadn’t been difficult, but to see it from a personal point of view had taken him quite a while. But once he’d allowed himself to glance behind the obvious he’d been surprised.

To think that all this while, all these months, Kylo had been intrigued with him from the start, had believed in him. Had chosen him.

He curled up on his side, the blanket up to his ears and the folded letter pressed against his chest. And right at this moment he was glad that Kylo wasn’t here.

Sleep didn’t come easy that night.


	16. Day 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux has to deal with his guilt...

The nagging feeling of guilt clung to him throughout the day. Guilt for not realizing Kylo’s amazing personality sooner. For not being intrigued sooner. For always being so damn focused on his career that he’d almost missed out on Kylo completely. If it hadn’t been for the brunet’s fascination, belief and – most of all – persistence there would probably be no _them_. No kisses. No shared quarters. No caresses. And certainly no calendar.

So, of course, he did the only thing he knew how to do: he immersed himself in his work. There was the inspection of the heart of the weapon, the very core of the planet. The oscillator was next on the list. It was the weak spot of his great machine of destruction. In an impromptu conference with the heads of engineering and security he discussed additional security measures and reinforcements that needed to be made. At last he visited the control stations that span the equator, most of them still in various degrees of construction. The last two hours of his tour he spent almost exclusively outside, trudging through snow and ice, standing in half-built buildings. In the beginning the short shuttle trips from one stop to the next were sufficient to warm him up again, but soon enough the vague warmth of the shuttle wasn’t able to thaw through the seemingly frozen layers of his clothes anymore to affect his ice-cold skin.

The storm that settled in wasn’t helping either. Tears from the harsh wind were staining his cheeks as he finally stepped into the shuttle for the last time.

Even back in his own quarters his ears were still burning from the cold. He’s glad he’s back. Without further ado he shed his stiff uniform and stepped into the shower. It felt burning hot and he had to dial the temperature down before his tormented skin warmed up again. Slowly he turned the heat up until the small room was filled with steam and he finally had the feeling of being able to breathe and move again. Even then he didn’t leave. Indulging wasn’t usually his style, but the warmth felt too good. Sinking deep into his muscles and bones, almost like when Kylo was wrapped around him in bed.

He smiled, imagining those strong arms around his middle. That broad chest pressed against his back, his chin on his shoulder. Just holding him. He parted quite unwillingly with that mental image.

After ordering a light meal to his quarter he wrote his reports and then ate in silence. He missed the banter. The mere presence of the other. He’d always prided himself on working best on his own, professionally as well as privately. And now here he was, on his own, longing for company.

He crawled in bed not much later, a mostly violet pouch and green socks waiting for him. It was only when he slipped the socks over his cold feet that he noticed that the guilt had stopped bugging him. Probably he’d been far too preoccupied with work or the cold to maintain the energy to hold onto it. Suddenly determined he grabbed the little bag and sat up straighter. Feeling bad about his actions a year ago wasn’t changing anything, apart from making him miserable. Instead he would cherish what he had right now and hold on to it. And he vowed to never make those old mistakes again. With a decisive motion he opened the pouch in his hands that held a bunch of small balls, rolling against each other in his grip.

Globes of maybe an inch in diameter, coated in a thin, metallic protective foil, rolled onto his palm. Curious he let them roll back into the bag except for one. Carefully he peeled the foil off and…

_Chocolate!_

He truly _was_ an idiot for brushing his teeth _before_ opening his surprise. His hesitation only lasted a few seconds, though. Before he could change his mind he popped the treat into his mouth, closing his eyes at the deliciously sweet taste. A quiet moan slipped from his lips, almost obscene in the silence of the room’s austerity.

Maybe he should slip one or two of them into his uniform jacket tomorrow. A small gratification against the sting of the icy coldness of the planet. But he wouldn’t have to leave the base tomo…

His eyes bulged as he felt it. A prickling on his tongue. And he heard it as well! Sizzling and crackling. He jumped in shock, knocked his head against the wall and his mouth dropped open, mouthing the ‘ouch’ that he was too proud to voice. The sizzling sound grew only louder. It felt like dozens of tiny explosions on his tongue, buzzing with energy amidst the sea of sticky sweetness.

His shoulders started shaking as the giggles forced their way out of his chest. It felt so foreign and _so good_. He was still grinning ten minutes later when he received a message from Mitaka. Kylo had sent a set of rendezvous coordinates for the following afternoon.

He couldn’t wait to share this kind of chocolate with Kylo in a passionate kiss full of tiny sparkles exploding between their tongues.


	17. Day 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is not how Hux had imagined this day. Not at all!

Kylo didn’t show up at the rendezvous point.

After a morning full of meetings to arrange further procedures on Starkiller Hux was finally back on the Finalizer again, roaming the bridge as they hurtled through space to meet up with the Supreme Leader’s apprentice.

Only an empty expanse of space greeted them upon their arrival. Even now, hours later, nothing had changed. There was no sign of the menacing black wings of Kylo’s command shuttle. No further message.

Hux wasn’t worried. It happened sometimes. Those special missions from Supreme Leader Snoke were always hard to calculate, their parameters mostly elusive. It was quite likely that something had come up to delay Kylo’s departure or that his earlier arrival time estimation had proven too optimistic. There was no reason to worry.

At least that’s what he told himself whenever that grey fog of anxiousness started to cloud his mind. He stalked the bridge until long into the evening, busying himself by making his officers uncomfortable with his intense scrutiny of their work.

Scolding himself for his own unnecessary nervousness he finally retired to his quarters. Still, he caught himself pacing aimlessly up and down and staring out into space.

This was stupid!

He turned towards the calendar, intent on distracting himself with that only to stop and stare. There was more gray wall than color. Only a few pouches left, either clumped together at one end or single bright spots against the bleakness of the wall. A sad and pathetic sight, that left him strangely hollow.

Without another glance he went into the living room to get some more work done. It was for naught. His gaze kept wandering towards the door or the chronometer.

His stomach was churning, protesting against the lack of dinner, but he didn’t feel like eating. When he couldn’t stand it anymore he popped a piece of the chocolate bar from day two into his mouth. It tasted dull.

He didn’t even know where Kylo was. How long was he supposed to wait until asking the Supreme Leader for the information to investigate?

With a forceful shake of his head he pushed himself up and snatched today’s pouch. There was nothing else to do anyway. He laughed when he saw what was inside. It was a nasty, hollow sound. He ignored it and got a glass instead.

He opened the small bottle, having no eye for the intricate design of the bluish-green glass, and poured himself a glass. The liquid seemed clear against the gray of the desk, but as he lifted the glass there was a faint black hue to it against the pale skin of his hand. He took a sip. It’s strong, burning its way over his tongue and down into his belly, leaving a faint taste of tar and berries. He knocked the rest of it down in one go.

He got another glass and stood at the panel of transparisteel, looking out into the darkness. Wondering.

Worrying.

Trying not to do either.

Before he knew it, the small bottle was empty and his head buzzing softly. He took a hot shower that made the alcohol go straight to his head. Or maybe that was due to his lack of food since midday. Anyway, tired and his head fuzzy he plopped into bed, trying to ignore the churning of his stomach. He turned around to face away from the view of space, feeling dizzy with the movement.

Closing his eyes he pulled the other pillow closer and buried his nose into it. The room was slowly spinning around him and the faint smell of Kylo was dragging him down, deeper and deeper.

The last thing on his mind before he finally fell asleep – and for the love of all that was holy he couldn’t say _why_ – was that ridiculous story of a ginger mouse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, more angst, I know ;)
> 
> Kylo WILL come back! Promise!


	18. Day 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is far too much personnel in the hangar.  
> At least in Hux' opinion...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You've suffered long enough through angsty chapters.  
> And I guess we all want to see Hux and Kylo together again, so...

“Welcome back, Lord Ren. I trust your mission was successful?” Hux asked, his gloved hands clasped behind his back to keep them from fidgeting. The hangar was full of troopers and technicians after all.

“It was indeed, General. I was able to obtain some information that might influence further First Order politics in the Muranee-sector.” Kylo stepped from his shuttle and walked off at a brisk pace.

Hux followed, concentrating on the news. Their biggest shipyard was in the Muranee-sector. “Very well. I’ll schedule a debriefing at,” he quickly checked his chronometer, “1500.” That left them exactly 52 minutes.

As soon as the doors to their quarters shut behind them Hux pushed Kylo against the wall, fumbling for the latches that opened his helmet. It clattered to the floor, unnoticed. His eyes roamed his lover’s face, finding it unchanged and unharmed and with an amused glint in those dark eyes. He didn’t wait a second longer. Pushing aside the dull throbbing in his head that had accompanied him the whole day so far, forgetting the queasy feeling in his stomach, left behind by too much alcohol on an empty stomach, now overshadowed by a warm, tugging prickling, he grabbed the knight and captured his lips in a fierce, hungry kiss. Hands started roaming then shedding robes and uniform alike, eager to touch pale, heated flesh.

They barely made it to the debriefing in time.

 

 

That evening Hux couldn’t get rid of the soft smile on his lips – not that he wanted to. Kylo was back and his mere presence had washed the restlessness and apprehension from the atmosphere of the room. His skin tingled as he thought back to this afternoon. He’d put everything into their passionate reunion. His worry, his relief. His guilt and his vow. To cherish the present. Everything that mattered to him that he couldn’t voice, hoping that Kylo would understand from the depth of his passion alone.

Now that his heartbeat as well as his mind had calmed down again, he picked one of the chocolate globes from his nightstand.

Kylo’s voice drifted in from the living room. “I see you… enjoyed the Varmian whiskey?” He held the empty bottle up and gave it a shake as Hux came back.

Hux shrugged, feeling his cheeks heating up. He’d rather forget last night entirely. “Come here,” he said, leaning against the doorframe. Kylo did. “There’s something I want to try.”

Without further information he lifted the unwrapped chocolate ball and bit half of it off. The other half he presented to Kylo who lifted a knowing eyebrow and opened his mouth with a tiny smirk.

Hux waited a bit, watched Kylo’s jaw moving as he rolled the chocolate around on his tongue. When the first sparkle exploded on his tongue he pressed his lips against his lover’s. Hands pushed into his hair, holding him in place, as their tongues entwined. The sweetness of the chocolate mixed with Kylo’s distinctive taste and the sizzling prickled between them, exotic and new and exhilarating. He moaned into the kiss. His arms closed around Kylo, his hands latching onto his lover’s clothes as his knees felt week.

Kylo’s strong arms lifted him up. Hux let it happen. He wrapped his legs around Kylo’s hips, still kissing him as he was gently placed on their bed. And they made love for the second time that day. Only this time they took their time. Instead of heated passion it was all about gentle caresses.

 

 

“Hey,” Kylo nudged his shoulder, pulling him from this blissfully lazy point between wakefulness and sleep, “you forgot something.”

“Mmh,” he hummed. When he didn’t move, Kylo nudged him again. Hux growled in displeasure but opened his eyes. A big yawn fought its way out of him and he blinked drowsily afterwards, stretching his arms to force his mind back awake. “What?”

Kylo grinned down at him. “You’re adorable!”

“Oh shut it!” He punched the next best part of Kylo he could reach but with no real force behind it.

“Here.”

A perfectly white pouch appeared before him, only dotted with tiny silver dots. He’d completely forgotten about the calendar. Just as he was about to grab it, Kylo pulled it back. “Maybe I’ll take that one.”

Frowning, but too content to be miffed about it, he watched the brunet pull out a piece of paper. It was a small one, only folded once. No big secret then.

Part of him was relieved.

And Kylo read.

“I love the way you let your guard down around me. I love it that you trust me enough to just be yourself.”

Hux swallowed.

It was suddenly there, a pressure around his chest. Squeezing, tight and warm at once. He noticed Kylo sliding back down onto his pillow and he knew he couldn’t stand that pressure any longer. He needed to do something.

He rolled over until he lay right on top of Kylo, their naked bodies flush against each other. Propped up on his forearms against Kylo’s muscular chest he looked into those dark eyes that gazed curiously back at him. Yes, he trusted him. Enough to divulge something he’d never said to anyone ever before and the pressure around his chest eased. At least a bit.

“I missed you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While writing this I realized how much I needed a happy Hux sprawled in his bed with a big big yawn on his face.


	19. Day 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Please tell me this is a joke!"

“Please tell me this is a joke!” Hux stared at the black fabric in his hand.

“I thought they’re sexy. Just, try them on? Pleeease?”

He relented, sighing heavily. Those damn, pleading eyes! He headed over into the bedroom, shed his uniform – neatly folding the items he’d use again – and his underwear to slip into the atrocity from his calendar. Stepping in front of the mirror made him gasp. This was even worse than imagined. The thin material of the tight boxer briefs was completely see-through, allowing a clear view at his cock and his pubic hair. And his ass. And that scar.

It was obscene.

“Wrap a gold chain around my neck and I look like a pleasure slave in a Hutt brothel!”

He shivered at the mere thought then turned around to find Kylo in the doorway. His eyes were wide as saucers and his mouth slightly agape, his tongue darting out every now and then to wet his lips. His lover stared, unabashed and clearly lost for words, and shifted restlessly, a sure sign for his arousal.

Hux was a bit surprised by the intensity of Kylo’s reaction. Taken off-guard or not, this was still Kylo. So, without thinking he straightened his shoulders and sauntered over to Kylo, slowly, making sure to move his hips and keep his goods on open display. He wasn’t sure what he was doing or _why_. It felt strange. _Wrong_. “So is this what you wanted? A pleasure slave for tonight?”

He’s nervous, his pulse thrumming through his whole body. He had never done anything like this before and he’s not sure if he’s really comfortable with it, with what he’s about to do. He couldn't believe he's actually doing this! He had never let himself be degraded like this, not since-- no, he's not going down _that_ road. Well, and he’d certainly never done it himself. Willingly.

He shivered.

With a submissive bow of his head that reminded him way too much of the little boy he’d been a long time ago, knuckling under to the harsh, disappointed gaze of his father, he knelt down in front of Kylo, the scar above his ass burning. His voice was low as he spoke, “I’m yours, master, to do as you please.”

He placed his hands on Kylo’s thighs, pressed them against the dark material of his pants to hide their trembling. As his hands stroked higher up he looked up as well, never meeting Kylo’s eyes, though. He told himself that it wouldn’t fit his role as a slave, but deep down he knew he was afraid to see the excitement in those dark brown eyes. He wasn’t sure what to do with this information. That Kylo got off on this blatant kind of power-play; that he liked to see Hux in a role that left him no will of his own. Pushing those thoughts away the best he could he focused back on his hands, pushed them up further towards Kylo’s crotch and cupped the indeed hard erection there. “You want me to…”

His question died on his tongue as Kylo reached down, one hand sliding under his chin the other grabbing his hand that still covered the other’s groin, forcing it away gently. He followed the soft pull and stood up, looked up until their eyes met. Hunger and lust burned in those dark pools, but only in the background, overshadowed by confusion and… concern?

“Stop Hux! This is not what I had in mind,” Kylo’s voice was soft, yet hoarse. “You’re-"  _Scared_ , Kylo said within his mind, "-uncomfortable.”

Hux mouth felt dry and all of a sudden he was very much aware of the revealing quality of his only piece of clothing and he felt terribly exposed.

Kylo’s thumb rubbed against his jaw, focusing his attention back on the other. “I never intended this as an invitation to slave role-play. Just-- just thinking of you with a slave collar… No! I don’t like it! Not one bit! And you do neither, I can feel it.”

Hux’ whole body relaxed and only now did he notice how tense he’d been the whole time. He turned his eyes away in shame, feeling embarrassed and so stupid.

Soft lips pressed against his cheek as a warm hand slid from under his chin over his neck back into his hair. The lips trailed further across his face until they captured his own. He sank into the kiss and into the warm embrace with a soft sigh. He pressed closer, slid his hand around the other’s waist to hold on tighter and he felt Kylo’s erection against his middle. Suddenly a hand was on his ass, stroking and caressing, fingers splayed possessively.

“I just wanted to see you in sexy underwear,” Kylo murmured against his lips. “I wanted to see the contrast of the black material against your white skin. And against your red hair.” The hand from his ass was slipping to his front, fingertips stroking across his pubic hair. “Yeah, especially that!”

Hux grinned against Kylo’s mouth, tentative at first, but with every word and every soft caress of gentle fingers his tension melted away for good. And for the first time in all of this he felt himself stirring. “You know, you’re overly fascinated with my hair color,” he mused.

Kylo’s eyes darted away for a moment, avoided his gaze, and Hux laughed. Truly laughed. This was pure gold. “Oh dear, so you _have_ a fetish after all.”


	20. Day 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was supposed to be a simply mission: attack the Resistance listening post full force and eradicate it. Nothing special at all.  
> Hux would never forget this day, though.   
> Never!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with a small guest appearance of Phasma :D

_Lord Ren was wounded during the attack_.

Phasma’s words still echoed through his mind as he strode into the hangar bay, his pace stiff and brisk. The area in front of the trooper transporter shuttles was crowded, a medical team checking each stormtrooper. Phasma spotted him at once and approached him immediately.

“Captain, report!”

“The resistance base has been destroyed. All data that hasn’t been deleted already was downloaded. Twenty-three resistance fighters have been taken prisoner, two high ranking officers among them and their chief engineer. They’re being brought to the brig as we speak,” Phasma relayed, her voice clipped and professional as always.

Hux’ gaze swept across his troops and the medics, one trooper swaying on the spot until another one steadied him. He nodded towards them although his mind was on Kylo as he asked, “What went wrong?”

“New weaponry, Sir. They used a kind of sonic cannon to disable our troops. Non-lethal, but without the protection of the helmets they would’ve taken out the whole garrison in an instant. Due to the helmets the effects were minor yet still debilitating. Dizziness, nausea, difficulty breathing.”

He didn’t like this one bit. The base should’ve been nothing but a small listening post, not a place for developing new weaponry. Or was the whole resistance equipped with it already? He needed to know what had happened to Kylo. But as a general he needed to think about the big picture first, needed to know more about this weapon. “The technology?”

“Destroyed. The data deleted. That’s why I hunted down their engineer and brought him back for questioning.”

Hux smirked. He could always count on her efficiency as well as her quick thinking. And still, there was the question of… “Lord Ren? What’s his condition?” He dreaded the answer.

“He was found barely conscious without his helmet. A resistance fighter was right next to him, killed by a lightsaber. I saw Lord Ren destroy one of the sonic cannons with his powers and I think the rebel used this distraction to rip his helmet off. He was exposed to the destructive powers of the sonic waves. I had him brought to the infirmary at once.”

 

* * *

 

Even hours later that waxy paleness still clung to Kylo’s face. At least he was lying in his own bed now, eyes closed. Hux wasn’t sure if he was sleeping or meditating. At least that’s what he’d tried to accomplish as Hux had left him two hours ago to conduct the interrogation of the rebel’s chief engineer and their officers himself – so far with no success. Even so, they had managed to gain some interesting information from the downloaded data.

He had called it a day after that, eager to get back to Kylo. It was strange – and awkward – seeing him like this. Weak and in need. Hux wasn’t good at caring for others, not in such a personal way and yet he couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. It was an odd feeling.

Kylo’s eardrums had been ruptured. The medics had patched him up the best they could but they would need at least four days to heal. Until then: no water against his ears and rest to not aggravate his poor balance any further.

_Did they talk?_

He winced, wondering if he’ll ever get used to this ‘talking within one’s mind’ stuff. Concentrating, he formed the words clearly within his mind’s eye.

_Not yet. But they will._ _Are you feeling any better?_

This time he felt the gentle push against his mind before Kylo’s voice appeared right inside his head. It sounded strained. The faint echo of a shrill ringing reverberated within his skull. He knew it had spilled over from his lover.

_A little. I need to meditate again tomorrow. I won’t wait four days to get my hearing back!_

Hux didn’t understand this whole Force-stuff, but when Kylo said that he could activate healing powers through meditation then he believed him. And the sooner Kylo was back to his usual self, the better. He didn’t like seeing him like this, clumsy and lightheaded and in pain from the ringing noise. And most of all: unable to hear a thing.

Luckily they had this other form of communication at their disposal, since Kylo also refused to speak, claiming the vibrations of his voice made him dizzy.

Hux picked today’s pouch off the calendar and lay down on his side in the bed, propped up on his elbow and facing Kylo. Maybe whatever was inside would distract Kylo a little bit. Before he opened it he reached over and stroked once through that dark hair. Brown eyes blinked open and followed his movements.

Incredibly slowly Kylo rolled onto his side, squeezing his eyes shut against the vertigo. He was breathing hard and blinking a few times before his face relaxed again on his pillow.

_Open it_. The shrill noise attacked Hux full force this time and he flinched. _Sorry! I can’t…_ The words wavered then the noise as well as the pressure of Kylo’s mind vanished. Kylo looked tired and he was in pain, it was only natural that he wasn’t able to properly concentrate anymore.

Hux smiled, strained. “It’s okay!” He spoke slowly and distinctly, hoping that Kylo would be able to read it from his lips. When the brunet’s lips twitched and settled in a frustrated line, he knew he’d gotten the message.

He shook the pouch between them and watched a small, square packet topple out. Frowning he turned it and had to grin. Sweets of course.

_You really want to fatten me up, huh?_ He wasn’t sure if Kylo would hear it, but he tried projecting it anyway. It earned him a small smile.

Opening it he was surprised to see something that felt like chocolate but wasp pale green in color. Skeptical he sniffed, then broke a piece off and tried it. It wasn’t as sweet as chocolate and although the consistency was similar it had a more powdery quality on his tongue. But the real experience lay in the slightly bitter aftertaste, almost like tea.

It was strangely intriguing.

He broke off another piece and held it out to Kylo who watched him. He took it, a small excited spark in his tired eyes. And he certainly seemed to enjoy the sweet.

Together they finished off the whole thing in silence. By the end Kylo was curled against his side, his head carefully placed onto his chest and his hand splayed on his belly. He’d fallen asleep.

And Hux let him. He hated going to bed without brushing his teeth, but he’d loath to disrupt his lover in his current condition even more. So instead he curled his arms protectively around Kylo and held him close.

Safe.

He’d always been better with actions than with words anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops, my love for h/c got the upper hand again. Sorry (no, not sorry at all *g*).  
> But this was the last time! Promise!


	21. Day 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quiet evening...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No more injuries! Promise! :D

The first time Hux heard the rumor was on his way to the brig to have another lovely chat with their resistance prisoners.

The second time he heard it was during a quick lunch in the officer’s mess.

Carefully whispered words. Sometimes in awe. Sometimes in fear.

_Ren is back_.

Which was absolutely ridiculous, of course.

Sure, he’d felt better this morning. That self-healing energy stuff really seemed to work – and Hux was grateful for that. Seeing Kylo in such a vulnerable state hadn’t felt right.

That ringing in his ears had been gone this morning, the dizziness only overtook him if he made sudden movements and – most importantly – he’d been able to hear again. Not much, just dull, garbled noises that made no sense but it had been a start. Well enough that Hux had felt reassured enough to leave for work.

He couldn’t help wondering, though, on his way back to the bridge. So he checked.

His quarters were empty.

Disgruntled – and worried against his will – he went back to his post.

Kylo showed up an hour later to inquire about the downloaded data from the resistance base, tall and dark and imposing as always.

_Are you okay?_ He focused on just that thought, hoping Kylo would pick up on it.

_I’m fine, Hux. Stop worrying, it doesn’t suit you._

He could detect the fond teasing behind those words, but still… the image of a pale and disoriented Kylo was too fresh in his mind.

Kylo swept onto the bridge a second time, right at the end of Hux’ shift, joining him at a set of screens. “In case you’re not otherwise engaged at the moment I’d propose another training session. Training room two is currently available,” he said, not exactly whispering, which was impossible with that mask, but with a lowered voice.

Hux didn’t doubt for a minute that his officers were straining to hear what was going on. He was very much aware that their relationship was an open secret amongst the crew; everyone knew but no one dared talking about it, at least not in their presence. However, Hux was too preoccupied right now with Kylo’s preposterous proposal to admonish his men to focus on their jobs. “As it happens I’ve got an appointment scheduled already. So have you, Lord Ren.”

With nothing more than a nod he left the ship in Mitaka’s hands for the next shift and more or less dragged Kylo with him to medbay. Kylo might _think_ he was fine but Hux preferred a second opinion, especially before attacking each other with lightsabers again.

Needless to say, Kylo wasn’t amused.

 

* * *

 

“I don’t need a ‘quiet evening’. I’m _fine_!” Kylo huffed and threw himself onto the couch in that overly dramatic way that he sometimes displayed when he didn’t get his way.

Hux wasn’t fazed by it. “You’re _almost_ fine. You heard what the doctor said: your eardrums still need some more healing to properly close. By tomorrow you should be fine.” He headed into the bedroom to change his uniform for something more comfortable. “Have you seen his face?” he snickered, his voice raised to carry into the other room. “I thought his eyes would pop out of his head as he realized that his four day estimation was _somewhat_ off.”

He was answered with a low chuckle. He plucked the small bag from the wall and opened it on his way into the living room. It was another metal box. Even before he opened it a peculiar smell tickled his nose. Like smoke and bacon and something dark.

He never expected _that_.

“Tea?” he asked, baffled, staring down at the teabags.

“It’s smoked tea.”

“Yeah, I can smell that. You want one?”

“No, thanks. That’s not a taste for everyone. But I like the smell.”

 

* * *

 

In the end Kylo seemed to enjoy their quiet evening after all. Hux was reading a book on his datapad, sipping every now and then from his tea, its flavor rich and like smoky velvet on his tongue. He needed to find out where he could get more of this. Music filled the room, a soft and unobtrusive instrumental piece that Kylo had chosen, without a doubt happy to have his hearing back, even though he didn’t admit it out loud.

Kylo’s head was lying on Hux’ lap, the side of his face leaning against his belly. Hux’ right hand rested against the side of Kylo’s neck, his thumb caressing the area beneath his ear while his fingertips gently fondled through the hair at the nape of his neck. Again Hux gazed down at his lover’s relaxed face and his greasy hair, due to his helmet and being forbidden to wash it because of his ears. A while ago he would’ve thought it disgusting to touch it, but now he thought back to Kylo’s foot rub and maybe the man was right. He really didn’t care, he was just glad that Kylo was okay.

“Would you read to me?” Kylo mumbled out of the blue. Hux had been sure he was sleeping already.

“You’re interested in the biography of Grand Moff Tarkin?” he asked back.

“Not really,” Kylo admitted, never opening his eyes. Instead he settled closer against Hux’ belly. “I just want to hear your voice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, I think Kylo is just as bad a patient as Hux, unwilling to just allow one's body the time it needs.  
> Hux thinks everything will go to hell without him to lead and supervise. Kylo is just really, really impatient with himself.


	22. Day 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a good day. And it gets even better...

“I can’t believe I walked through the ship like this!” Hux shook his head in disbelief and yet he laughed. The chemical cocktail of endorphins from a good workout still coursing through his system. It made him giddy.

Kylo just pulled him close and pressed a sloppy kiss on his lips. “You look damn hot!”

Hux seriously doubted that. His hair was plastered against his head, his shirt and pants damp and sticky with sweat and he had no doubt that his face was still red with exertion. And Kylo didn’t fare that much better.

His shoulders still ached from the unfamiliar strain but not as much as last time. They’d been so engrossed in their training they’d completely forgotten time. Only when a bunch of technicians had requested entry for their weekly sport session had they realized their error. The men had looked horrified upon the realization _whom_ they’d just interrupted. Hux had assured them good-naturedly that they’d be out of their way immediately, leaving a bunch of baffled subordinates. Unwilling to shower with a bunch of staffers in the room they’d opted for the shower in their quarters.

It was really no big deal and his mood was way too good to be bothered.

Kylo was fully healed. Their resistance engineer in the brig had caved and started blabbing the moment Kylo had dipped into his mind, scaring the guy shitless, obviously. And on top of that a satisfactory workout.

“I’m taking a shower now,” Hux declared, his lips barely an inch apart from Kylo’s. His hand trailed up the other’s chest until his index finger hooked into the collar of Kylo’s shirt. He pulled. “And you are coming with me!”

Interrupted by kisses and pulling off clothes along the way it took them a while until they made it into the bedroom. Hux got rid of his pants while Kylo leaned against the wall to slip out of his boots. That’s when Kylo paused all of a sudden, his eyes transfixed to a point across the room.

“What?” Hux asked, almost growled, not fond of the distraction right now.

“You need to unpack your calendar.”

Hux rolled his eyes. “That can wait.” And with that he stepped in front of Kylo and pressed his lips against his neck, kissing and sucking to get his attention back.  

“No, it can’t,” Kylo insisted and sure enough the copper pouch was in his big hand all of a sudden. “Open it now!”

If that meant he could get back to sex in the shower, very well. He pulled it open and revealed a small bottle. There was some alien on it with purple hair. He knew neither the race nor could he read anything written on it.

“It’s shampoo,” Kylo explained.

“Great.” Hux paid no further attention to it, but took it with him as he dragged Kylo into the refresher and the shower stall.

 

* * *

 

Warm water was raining down on them as they leaned against each other and the wall for support, trying to catch their breath. His shower stall hadn’t been designed to accommodate two people, let alone two tall men having sex. It had been tricky and had involved some serious creativity once or twice but if there’s one thing they had in abundance, then it was stubborn persistence.

“We need to do that again,” Hux said as he carefully turned around and further into the spray of water as his legs felt steady again.

“Yeah, but next time we switch places. I think the shower caddy left a permanent dent in my hip.”

“Stop whining!”

Hux relaxed into the water, his eyes closed. Kylo’s hands settled on his shoulders for a while in a deft massage that left him moaning. Then those hands left. When they came back again they maneuvered him out of the immediate spray and stroked through his hair. Only as the soft noise of bursting bubbles hit his ears and as the movements of Kylo’s hands turned into caressing circles did he realize that Kylo was shampooing his hair.

“So, what’s so special about this shampoo?” So far there had always been some reason behind Kylo’s choices and he was curious about this one. It wasn’t the smell, because there was almost none.

“It’s from Zharhado.”

“Never heard of that.”

“It’s in the outer regions of the Outer Rim. The Zharadonians are famous for their colorful hair. Green, purple, blue, anything you can imagine. And they pride themselves on it. It’s said their shampoo is the best. It brings out the best of any hair color.”

Hux couldn’t help the small shake of his head as he started chuckling. “You _really_ have a fixation on my red hair, haven’t you?”

 

* * *

 

He stared at the mirror, his mouth slack. This couldn’t be _his_ hair, right?

The red was shining, vibrant, with an unprecedented brilliance. And the slight orange hue underneath added the idea of fire, of something alive.

And all of this because of a _shampoo_? What would his crew think when they saw him like this?

There was no time speculating as Kylo pulled him around at that moment and crushed him with a fierce kiss. “You’re so damn hot,” Kylo panted in between kisses, pressing his pretty obvious proof against Hux’ thigh. They tumbled onto the bed. Kylo stopped his eager administrations only to look down at Hux with big eyes, pupils blown wide. “Next time, I’ll use it on _all_ your hair!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, Kylo has indeed a little fetish for red hair. I'm not sure if he's always had it or if it only developed after he met Hux, but that's not really important, isn't it? ;)  
> Anyway, he loves every ginger hair on his lovely ginger :D


	23. Day 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a little bit of art...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I needed this today. A tiny piece of fun and happiness after this day of grief...

“You want me to explore my creative vein?” Hux asked, skeptical, as the long, thin stick that poked out of today’s golden pouch turned out to be a paintbrush. He hadn’t even noticed the gray stick in front of his gray wall until he tried to take the pouch off.

“So to speak?”

Hux pushed the fabric down around the heavy thing inside and exposed a broad glass bottle filled with a dark brown liquid. Ink? That’s when he spotted the writing on the other side of the bottle. His eyes widened before he chuckled in disbelief. Of course it was no ink.

“Bodypaint? Really?”

Kylo grinned. “No. _Eatable_ bodypaint! It’s chocolate flavor.”

Hux opened the bottle and sniffed. It certainly smelled like chocolate. He dipped the wooden end of the brush in and licked it clean. Chocolate, indeed!

Kylo reached his hand out to take the bottle. “Here, let me show you. I’ve got some great ideas already that…”

Hux snatched his hand away and shook his head. “No. I don’t trust you with sticky things in my bed.” Oh dear, had he really just said that?

Judging from Kylo’s snorting laughter he had. “Did- did you seriously just…”

It wasn’t easy for Hux to keep a serious face. It was even harder to _not_ think about all the cum this bed had seen, one sticky mess after another. But it was a matter of principle now not to acknowledge his slip of the tongue. “You had the blindfold. I get to paint!”

 

* * *

 

“Are you going to start at some point?” Kylo asked, lying naked on his stomach.

Hux was kneeling next to him, brush and paint in his hands, staring. For a while now. “Turn over.”

With a frown Kylo did so, his pecs on open display as he wiggled in a comfortable position. “What? Was that canvas not up to your standard?”

Hux hummed, nodding. “I like this one much better,” he said, indicating Kylo’s chest and belly with a jerk of his chin. “It’s more challenging. This one has some flaws,” he tapped the end of the brush lightly against one of Kylo’s nipples, “that need concealing and I like the challenge. Also, this one has my favorite mole on it.”

“Your _what_?”

“Hey,” he poked with a finger against the brunet’s unprotected side, “don’t judge! You like my freckles and I like some of your moles more than others. End of discussion.”

 

* * *

 

“Which one is it?”

Hux didn’t look up from where he leaned over Kylo and connected the countless moles dotting his skin into intricate patterns and constellations, seeing them as dark little stars in the inverse universe of Kylo’s pale skin. He tried to make up names for the constellations he painted, or little stories behind those names, but his imagination had never been good with stuff like that. Imagining a whole battle scenario, no problem, but a trivial story? His mind couldn’t come up with anything.

“Hm?” he hummed, too distracted by the way the chocolate paint still glistened against pale skin although it had partly dried already.

“Which one is your favorite?”

Hux looked up. Kylo’s head was propped up on his arms, crossed behind his head. It took Hux a second to realize what he was talking about. He thought about refusing to answer but couldn’t find a good reason why. So instead he shuffled a bit downward and circled one of the bigger moles right next to Kylo’s belly button with chocolate. “That one.”

“Why that one?”

“Because it’s defying gravity.”

“Huh?” Kylo’s eyebrows shut up in confusion. “I’m afraid I don’t follow.”

Hux chuckled softly, highly amused to see Kylo truly baffled for once. He points the tip of the brush against the mole. “It looks a bit like a planet on the verge of a black hole.” The brush slipped off the mole and dipped into Kylo’s naval, painting it dark. Kylo’s breath hitched at the unexpected touch against sensitive skin. Hux held his gaze as he went on, “It should be sucked inside. It’s too close and yet somehow, it’s resisting the gravitational pull. It’s impossible and stubborn. Just like you!”

For a moment the room fell silent. Kylo just stared at him, clearly at a loss.

Hux dipped the brush into the chocolate again and used it to fill up the other’s belly button some more – and to hear that delicious hissing sound again. Surprisingly _that‘s_ the moment Kylo found his voice again.

“And you think you have no imagination…”

Hux’ head shot up at that, he didn’t like it when Kylo did that. Rooting around his brain without invitation and not for communication. It made him feel uneasy. Powerless. Even though he trusted Kylo. “You shouldn’t…”

“I’m not,” Kylo reassured him quickly. “You were projecting. Loudly. It was kind of hard _not_ to listen.”

He wasn’t keen on commenting, neither on his loud thoughts nor his imagination, so instead he dipped the brush into the dark brown sea inside Kylo’s naval and used it to sketch a pair of parallel wings around his favorite mole, one on each side. As he looked at it one of the lights was reflecting in the sea of chocolate, making the perfect highlight, and he couldn’t help but grin.

“What do you think? A TIE-fighter right next to the Death Star!”

And Kylo looked. Frowning. Then tilted his head, frowning harder. “I only see a weird looking bonbon falling into a sarlacc pit.”

Hux snorted with laughter. He tried hard for an indignant tone but he failed miserably. “You have _no_ eye for art! At all!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, I'm with Kylo here: Hux has definitely more imagination that he gives himself credit for!


	24. Day 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's one secret left...

Hux fumbled the soft fabric of the pouch. It was an intricate, multicolored pattern that reminded him of an ancient and expensive tapestry. Next to it on his lap lay a piece of paper, folded multiple times.

A secret.

He couldn’t bring himself to pick it up. Today had been a really, really long day and he was exhausted. Sure, a part of him wanted to know more about the fascinating man currently in the refresher, wanted to know _everything_ , but another part was hesitant, afraid of what he might learn. Maybe another secret that would point up his own emotional inadequacy.

He couldn’t do this today.

“Aren’t you going to read it?”

Hux jumped. He hadn’t noticed that Kylo had stepped back into the bedroom. “Sure,” he hurried to say and picked the paper up after all, “I was just lost in thought.”

“That much was obvious.” The bed dipped behind him and shortly afterwards he felt Kylo sitting right behind him, placing one hand on his shoulder, the other at his side and a gentle kiss at the nape of his neck.

Hux couldn’t shake the feeling that Kylo knew exactly what he’d been thinking. To distract himself he unfolded the paper, still a bit wary. The handwriting looked just as last time. Warmth was spreading on his skin at the places Kylo’s hands were resting. He concentrated on that for a moment before he finally started reading.

He only managed one sentence before he started laughing.

_I had a pet-tooka once._

Hux remembered those clever little beasts from Arkansis. His father had ranted and raved about the reckless freighter captains that had brought them to the planet in the first place, mostly because they always found a way into their private premises or the Academy’s and destroyed all kinds of things in their hunts for food or simply in boredom.

Leave it to Kylo to pick a temperamental pest as a pet.

“You and a tooka?” he finally managed to say. “I don’t envy your parents.” It slipped out before he could properly think about it. He tensed. Bringing up Kylo’s parents hadn’t been his intention.

But Kylo’s lips against his neck pulled into a smile before he chuckled. “You’re probably right. On the other hand, a little annoyance served them right for neglecting me.”

Reassured that everything was fine Hux read on, now truly curious.

_It was way back, I was five or six, back on Chandrila where my mother was involved in the early days of the New Republic. We had this small house at the edge of the city and I often roamed the fields and woods nearby. Don’t ask me how it started but someday that wild tooka that I played with in the woods followed me home and never left._

“A _wild_ tooka? Oh dear Lord. Did you at least train it?”

“More or less?”

Little Kylo and a wild tooka. Hux would’ve loved to see pictures.

_We were thick as thieves. My parents hated him, but I guess they felt guilty for rarely being home so they let me keep him. He could be super cute with his unusual reddish-brown fur and his blond face, but he was a feisty one who refused to listen to anyone. He only listened to me. Well, at least sometimes._

_Some of the neighborhood kids ganged up on me one day – picking on the weirdo was their favorite past time, but only if they were in a group, they never dared it alone. They never thought a cute little tooka a threat. Idiots. I think they still have scars from those claws…_

Hux turned his head to glimpse at Kylo out of the corner of his eye. “I’ve seen tookas hunt and fight. And I’ve seen _you_ fight. I think that little pet has rubbed off on you.”

Kylo pinched his side in retaliation before he declared, his chin on Hux’ shoulder, “I’ll take that as a compliment!”

“What happened to him?”

“Keep reading.”

_I had to leave him behind when the Galactic Senate – and therefore we as well – moved to Ganthel two years later. My father wouldn’t allow him on his ship._

_His name was Armie._

Hux froze. And stared. He read that last sentence again.

“You’re kidding me!” It was barely more than a whisper, he was too stunned.

Kylo’s chuckle was answer enough.

And then he remembered and something clicked. He pulled back, indignantly, and turned, his movements quick as his eyes searched for Kylo’s gaze.

“So you _were_ giggling. I _knew_ it. That cough had sounded off. You were laughing and you tried to mask it.” He remembered it clearly now. It had been shortly after Kylo had been assigned to the Finalizer. They’d both attended an official meeting with high ranking First Order personnel and one of the older generals had recognized him as Brendol’s son and called him by his first name: Armitage. Oh how he hated that name! And Kylo, a few feet away, had suddenly fallen victim to a suspicious sounding coughing fit.

Kylo was laughing in earnest now. “Come on, you would’ve, too. The fierce and clever General with his sharp tongue that cuts just as deep as claws, practically shares a name with my childhood pet. _Of course_ I laughed!”

He still did. And Hux would’ve almost joined in. Instead his eyes narrowed dangerously. “Did you just compare me to a tooka?”

The moment Kylo’s lips twitched Hux lunged at him, toppling them both over into the sheets where they rolled around in a sloppy, playful fight.

It’s a good thing no one heard their laughter. It would’ve only unsettled the crew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you don't know what a tooka is/looks like:  
> 


	25. Day 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last one...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish you all Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!  
> Enjoy the days with your loved ones!

“The last one.” He hadn’t thought that first day that he’d miss the garish colors on his wall, but he did already.

Kylo waited for him on the couch. There was the same fond reminiscence in his expression that Hux was sure he was wearing himself. The only difference was that he felt this underlying sadness that it was over whereas something in Kylo’s gaze seemed eager, full of anticipation.

He leaned against the other and fumbled with the pouch, somehow not ready to open it.

“I had to change the plan a bit since you decided to open them in the evening,” Kylo said.

“What? Why?”

“You’ll see.”

Even after these last three weeks he still couldn’t believe that Kylo had gone through all this trouble just to give him a treat. But it hadn’t been just that. Kylo had shared a part of himself. And now it was over.

Slowly he opened the pouch and found a small slip of paper. He wasn’t really surprised, although he couldn’t say why exactly.

 _Be ready for a surprise tomorrow_.

That’s all it read.

“You know, that’s pretty unfair, right?”

And Hux felt Kylo chuckling next to him. “Oh yes. I know.“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I know, this one is VERY short, but on the other hand, Hux will get a surprise tomorrow and you'll get a longer chapter (twice as long as the usual ones). Promise!
> 
> I'll be posting this last chapter early tomorrow morning, I think.  
> See you then :)


	26. Day 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux finally gets his big surprise.  
> And maybe, just maybe, Kylo gets one as well...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my God, this is the last chapter. I can't believe time flew by this fast.
> 
> Well, I had a great time and lots of fun experimenting with those two and a big, big thank you to all of you who shared this time with me, who read this story, gave kudos and/or left comments!
> 
> I wish you all wonderful holidays and a happy new year!
> 
> And, of course, a lot of fun with the finale :D

“Stop worrying!”

“I’m not…”

“Yes, you are!” Kylo interrupted him. “It’s coming off of you in waves. Your ship will survive a day without you.”

“That’s not-“ _-all of it_. But he didn’t say it. Instead he left it there and made an effort to relax his shoulders. He took a deep breath of air, even closed his eyes to completely take it in. Fresh air, saturated with the smell of earth and moss, and maybe a tiny bit chilly.

Kylo closed his arm around his shoulders and pulled him against him for a moment. “That’s the spirit!”

Waking up that morning to an already fully dressed Kylo, who was all giddy and grinning madly, had been _something_ to say the least. The crazy brunet had arranged a free day for them both – obviously Mitaka was in on it, Hux could only imagine how _that_ conversation had gone. After he’d dressed in civilian clothes for slightly cooler weather as per his lover’s instructions Kylo had lost no time and flown them off to some planet Hux had never been to before.

“I’ve been told there’s a waterfall there,” Kylo pointed up ahead into the thick of trees, “hidden from sight. You have to follow the sound to find it.”

An off-road hike through a forest in autumn to find a hidden waterfall… that was just _so_ Kylo. Hux took another deep breath to remind himself that he was off-duty. That they had all the time in the world. That he had Kylo just to himself. And that it had been an awfully long time since he’d been off the ship – truly off the ship not just for a two-hour mission.

“Follow the sound, huh? We could also just follow that little stream over there,” Hux pointed towards their left where water sparkled between the trees.

The little shove against his shoulder didn’t come as a surprise. “Smartass!”

They strolled through the forest, following the path along the stream for the most part. The sun was shining down through the foliage, highlighting the colorful arrangement of leaves and forming pools of warmth and light on the forest floor. The sounds of nature their only companions: the soft gurgling of the water, the rustling of dead leaves on the path, the chirping of birds. They were completely alone here.

Finding the waterfall proved trickier than expected. It involved climbing over fallen trees, slipping on wet leaves and therefore lots of bantering and laughing at and with each other. Even without the indeed stunning view of water cascading over an array of moss-covered stones that trip would’ve been worth it.

Only when the shuttle got back into view on their way back did Hux realize how completely he’d left the responsibility-ridden general behind in that forest. And Kylo seemed to be determined to keep it that way.

“Catch!”

He did, grabbing the hilt of Kylo’s lightsaber out of the air as it spun his way all of a sudden.

“Are you up for a new training session?” Kylo asked, activating his auxiliary saber and twirling it in his hand.

Hux grinned and activated his own weapon as he took up his fighting stance. “What do you think?”

Kylo laughed. “Just what I thought. Today’s lecture: realistic surroundings.”

 

* * *

 

“There we are,” the green-skinned Twi’lek said and pointed towards one of the three doors within the hallway. She stepped forward, opened it and cleared the way with a courteous smile. “Enjoy your stay!”

Kylo thanked her and entered. Hux followed him quickly with a polite nod in her way, trying to hide his embarrassment behind his usual mask of professional indifference. It wasn’t really working. She closed the door and he immediately turned around and shoved his fist against Kylo’s shoulder.

“What was _that_ for?” the brunet whined, rubbing the aching spot.

Hux’ eyes bulged. “ _Seriously_? You can’t just drag me into a luxury spa _like this_!” To clarify he pointed down at himself. “I look like something a tooka dragged in!”

And he did. He was sweaty all over from their training session earlier and his hair was askew. Grass stains graced his knees and his left elbow from when he’d underestimated the uneven ground. His slacks were crumpled and he was sure that grass and earth was still clinging to the back of his light brown sweater.

Kylo shrugged, clearly not seeing the point. “So? Nobody knows you here.”

Hux wasn’t surprised. Not really. Instead of investing his energy in being angry – which he didn’t want to, not today, it would only spoil this great day – he simply rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat. And maybe also a bit fondly. “You’re impossible!”

Kylo only grinned at that.

They were in a small antechamber with a wardrobe and a simple shelf. A set of fluffy maroon bathrobes as well as matching slippers were waiting for them. Kylo placed his bag on the shelf and started undressing. So Hux did the same.

As he turned around again, completely naked, Kylo was watching him, the already big grin on his face growing even wider.

“What?” Hux asked. He looked down at himself, confused by the mischievous quality of Kylo’s smile, but he saw nothing special. He looked just as he always did. Lifting his head again the brunet was suddenly right in front of him, reaching out a hand to cup his cheek. Kylo’s thumb was softly stroking across his cheekbone.

“You should go out into the sun more often.”

“Huh?“ He didn’t follow. Not when his mind was still distracted by that sudden change in proximity. And that soft caress on his face.

“Your freckles. They’re more prominent now. I never realized you had them on your face as well,” he said, sounding absolutely in awe.

Hux grumbled in dismay. “Great!“

Kylo nudged his face upwards, calling for attention. “I know you don’t like them, but they’re your most devious quality. You just don’t realize it.”

His eyes narrowed on instinct, skeptical, but also highly intrigued. “How so?”

“Humans tend to associate freckles with children and therefore with innocence and someone easy to influence and control.”

Hux huffed. This was nothing new and exactly the reason he disliked them so much.

“So, your freckles work in your favor, letting others underestimate you, leaving them vulnerable and surprised when they have to realize what you’re really capable of.”

Hux could only stare at him for a moment. “I never looked at it like that,” he admitted, wondering how far his father’s influence on his way of thinking actually reached.

“Thought so.” Kylo kissed his nose, just a short peck, then grinned and pulled him along into the adjacent shower.

 

* * *

 

After cleaning the sweat off and slipping into the warm and fluffy bathrobes Kylo opened another door and Hux’ mouth dropped open. In front of him opened a big room, underground just as the rest of the complex, but completely carved out of dark stone. There was an area with comfortable looking sunbeds, a table behind it, laden with food and an assortment of drinks, placed in a portable cooling unit. On the other side of the room was a second shower unit, completely open and the water running. The left side looked like soft rain, on the other side the water was dropping down in a broad stream like a waterfall. But the biggest part of the room was filled with a giant pool – by the looks of it of natural origin. Steps were running into the water that was steaming invitingly.

Everything was illuminated by a warm, flickering light from many different sources all around the walls. It almost looked like torches but the air in here was way too humid for that. And there was no soot.

It was breathtakingly beautiful and _theirs_. He was lost for words.

That warmth within his chest that had accompanied him the whole day already exploded even further, spread, grew hotter without ever burning him. But the pressure was also back, threatened to lock itself around his chest and…

Before he had the chance to get overwhelmed Kylo led him towards the table and left him no time to brood. They shared a light meal. Fed each other with different kinds of fruit and bread and salad before they finally immersed into the steaming water of the hot spring.

Hux sighed in pleasure. This was _nothing_ like a hot shower. This felt as if the warmth not only seeped into him but became a part of him. His muscles loosened and his skin prickled and…

A torrent of water splashed right into his face.

He spluttered in shock. Then in irritation. His eyes narrowed at the dark-haired and his innocent expression. Retaliation followed suit as Hux hollowed his hands and pushed them towards Kylo, but the splashing water stopped mid-air, only inches from Kylo’s face, held in place by the Force.

“That’s cheating!” Hux burst out.

It took only seconds and they were fighting in earnest, laughing and screaming like children. They both knew that it was silly and neither of them cared. They were alone, no one could see them and they had _so much_ fun.

 

* * *

 

It was too hot yet Hux was too lazy and way too blissfully spaced out to move right now. Kylo was lying in the shallow end of the water next to the stairs, his head on the edge of the pool, and Hux was floating half on top of him, half besides him. Having sex inside a hot spring was at the same time one of the best things they’d ever done and one of the worst ideas as well. He felt like a vegetable within a soup that sat on the stove for hours: overheated and on the verge of losing all remaining cohesion.

Maybe they should get out of the water, cool down under the shower and relax on the sunbeds for a while, but then they’d have to move.

He looked up at Kylo, studied his relaxed features and his slightly flushed face. A content smile graced his lips and the only reason Hux was sure that he wasn’t sleeping was Kylo’s hand that was currently stroking lazily through Hux’ hair.

His gaze trailed further, across the pool and the showers and the food and just _everything_. And the pressure around his chest was back. All of this was just for him. This whole day, but not just that. Days of thoughtfulness, of trust. He couldn’t escape it any longer. And somehow he didn’t want to.

This was all too much.

He needed to give something back.

No, he _wanted_ to give something back.

And he needed to get rid of those restraints to finally breathe free again. Maybe it would be his undoing. Maybe not. It didn’t matter, because there was no other way for him anyway.

Even enclosed in heat a shiver ran down his body. Kylo tensed immediately, sensing that something was wrong. His brows pulled into a frown as his eyes opened.

“Hux?”

He looked up, right into dark brown eyes. His chest hurt, the squeezing pressure holding him tight. He knew what to do, but it wasn’t easy. Not for him. And it was different than last time. Harder. But he never shied away from challenges.

“I love you!”

There, he’d said it. The words he’d never spoken to anyone in his life before. Words he never thought he would say, let alone _feel_. But they’re true. And maybe that makes him weak like his father had always told him. But maybe they also made him strong in a way his father would’ve never been able to understand.

Either way, for the first time in months the pressure in his chest finally dissolved without a trace.

The fingers in his hair stilled for a moment, just as Kylo’s eyes widened for a second. The importance of him uttering those words isn’t lost on him. But he’s also Kylo Ren, the man who had the tendency to make a big deal out of everything but also the ability to know when it was essential to do the opposite.

Like now.

Kylo simply smiled, happily, and squeezed him for a second. “I love you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> A penny for your thoughts?


End file.
